ManageYour Managers

Sure, letting rip at your boss might provide some short-term catharsis, but to make meaningful change in your working life, you need to choose your words carefully. Try these ideas from VitalSmarts’ Hale

You want to say: “I need flexibility. Can I work from home once a week?” They could hear: “A four-day week would be particularly nice over the summer.” Say instead: “It’s important to me that I’m contributing as much as I can to the team. I’ve noticed that on days when [insert semi-regular event here], things get a little chaotic. I’m curious about whether I’d get more done if I worked remotely on those days.”

You want to say: “I’m at the end of my rope. I need to get my head together.”

They could hear: “I stayed out way too late last night and want to nurse my hangover without using up my annual leave.”

Say instead: “Delivering [insert company goal] has been a lot

trickier than any of us expected, and I’ve been here late every night for the past week. I’m worried that if I don’t step away for a day, I’m not going to be able to keep working at my optimum and may get sick.”

You want to say: “I never hear about the good things I’ve done, only the mistakes. Motivate me!” They could hear: “I’m a Millennial snowflake and need a gold star.” Say instead: “I love working on this team, but I’ve realised I should have been honest about something that helps me perform at my best. When I do something that stands out to you as a valuable contribution, could you take 30 seconds and just let me know?”