Bri­tain’s No1 glam­our model

Midweek Sport - - NEWS - With Lin­sey Dawn Mcken­zie

I AP­PEAR to be the new Claire Rayner! I had a trans­ves­tite con­tact me for ad­vice last night on Red Light Cen­tral.

He was ask­ing me if I thought he should have his cock chopped off.

I told him I thought it sounded a bril­liant idea! He’s al­ready had his boobs done so why not?

I’m glad I was born a woman, I have to say – es­pe­cially as I can have sex with guys and girls.

The whole sex swap op­er­a­tion sounds ex­cru­ci­at­ing, hav­ing your knob turned in­side out and made into a fanny.

But as I said to this fella last night, at least when he has it done he’ll be able to have a fid­dle with him­self more dis­creetly!

All you need to do when you’re a girl is chuck a coat over your lap and you can strum away to your heart’s con­tent – any­time, any­place, any­where!

I’LL be on Red­light Cen­tral on Thurs­day and Fri­day this week on Sky Chan­nels 902, 948 and 911 from 10pm un­til 5.30am. I HAD a good frisk this week­end at the footy!

I wasn’t bonk­ing in the stands though, I just got felt up a fair bit go­ing through se­cu­rity!

It was the QPR and Chelsea game. Some nut­ter had sent a bul­let in the post to An­ton Fer­di­nand and it was the first time that the two teams had played each other since the al­leged racism on him by John Te rry.

There’s al­ways plenty of good ban­ter on the ter­races and when you’r e a foot­baller you need to ex­pect a bit of flak.

But I think when it cr osses the line to racist taunts, that is just too much in this day and age. It needs to be stamped out. I WAS sad­dened to read about the in­quest of Gary Speed.

It still doesn’t help solve the rid­dle of how a seem­ingly happy fam­ily man with a lovely wife and kids and a great life died.

I thought the Coroner’s in­ves­ti­ga­tion might of­fer some kind of ex­pla­na­tion about why he was found hang­ing in his house.

But Ni­cholas Rhein­berg said that his death could have been an ac­ci­dent caused by him slump­ing for­ward with a noose round his neck.

And, although he’d texted threat­en­ing to take his own life, be­cause there was no note they couldn’t rule he killed him­self de­lib­er­ately.

My heart goes out to Louise and his poor fam­ily. They will never know what hap­pened to Gary and it’s sad that the in­quest hasn’t re­ally done any­thing to help them deal with their pain.

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