We need this like a hole in the head!

Midweek Sport - - NEWS -

you feel­ing a bit de­pressed now that the fes­tive sea­son is over?

Do you need some­thing to cheer you up on these cold, dark Jan­uary nights?

Well, fear not be­cause Si­lent Wit­ness is back on BBC1 – and it’s all about a se­rial killer pick­ing off in­no­cent folk with a sniper’s ri­fle. Happy New Year, folks! The vic­tims so far in­clude: An ex­cited young woman look­ing for­ward to her im­mi­nent wed­ding. Bang! A nice chap who mows the lawns for free at the lo­cal war vet­er­ans’ home. Bang! A young cou­ple mourn­ing the re­cent death of their baby daugh­ter. Bang! Bang! Oh yes, and an ex­tra “Bang!” for the Good Sa­mar­i­tan who tried to help them.

Those last three were killed on a petrol sta­tion fore­court, which is just bloody lovely. The price of un­leaded nudges be­low £1.10 for the first time in a decade but can we just en­joy it? Oh no!

In­stead of fret­ting about leav­ing the en­tire con­tent of our wal­lets in the till, we have to worry about leav­ing the con­tents of our skull all over the fore­court.

Shows like this are not just bad for our men­tal health. They are bad for our waist­lines, too.

We don’t need horse-faced Katie Hop­kins (see be­low) telling us why we’re all fat knack­ers.

It is all Si­lent Wit­ness’s fault for mak­ing us afraid to go out­side just as we were promis­ing to take up jog­ging for our New Year’s res­o­lu­tion.

The irony is that the sniper is said to be work­ing around the M25.

At this time of the year, there must be loads of peo­ple do­ing that hor­ri­ble com­mute for the first time af­ter Christ­mas, and they are prob­a­bly wish­ing some­one WOULD take them out with a high ve­loc­ity round.

With another 12 months of the dreaded rat race ahead of us – and with shows like this mak­ing us all bloody ter­ri­fied and mis­er­able – it’s a won­der we don’t all start paint­ing tar­gets on our wind­screens.

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