Boring missus lets me bore her mate

I was downing my third pint when one of my female neighbours walked in and asked if she could join me.

She bought me another pint and I started to unburden myself.

After a while she laughed and told me I was going about it the wrong way, with all those young birds.

She said: “If you want to feel young, bed an older woman – someone who can appreciate what good shape you’re in.

“I’d love to f**k a man who doesn’t have a beer gut and man-boobs.”

I caught her eye as she said it and I could see the twinkle there. She was chatting me up. “How old are you?” I asked. “I’m 59, she replied. “Old enough to MY wife is a wonderful woman but a bit of a bore in the bedroom.

As a result, I’ve had a number of girlfriends who’ve let me fulfil my true fantasies.

One girl I had let me do her up the arse while using a vibrator on her.

So, as you can imagine, my wife has a lot to live up to between the sheets.

She has a mate who I really fancy and when I came home the other night her pal was there.

They’d a had a bit to drink and were fooling around with their mobile phones.

My missus whispered to me: “It’s your lucky night” – but I was baffled until the two of them led me upstairs and stripped slowly and enticingly as I lay on the bed.

When they were naked they gave me one of the phones and told me to film as they indulged in lesbo action. My wife! Lesbo action! I couldn’t believe it. But it got better when they lay back on the bed and invited me to do both of them.

I had no hesitation as I leapt on the wife’s pal, thinking that my missus would think better of it when she sobered up. But not a bit! The wife then filmed the whole thing and now watches it back endlessly. But there’s still not much bedroom action with her.

What’s going on?

Bexie says…

TG, Essex SIT down, watch the film with her and ask what’s up.