Filthy MILFS want to charge me £100 for a sex session

I LIVE in a semi which backs on to another one occupied by a very attractive young widow in her 30s.

I went round there one day to ask if she would mind me cutting the hedge between our houses.

After I’d finished, she made me a coffee and we sat in her kitchen chatting. Then, without warning, she stripped off and asked me if I’d like to shag her!

I couldn’t believe my luck and I was soon deep inside the blonde beauty – and she was one hell of ride.

She encouraged me to fill all her holes and enjoyed three climaxes during our 50-minute session while I shot my load all over her face and boobs.

Since then I’ve been back for more brilliant nookie. But what do I do if the wife finds out? I HOPE she DOES find out, you cheat. I’M in my late 30s and I have to admit that I have never been that successful with the ladies.

It’s not that I haven’t got anything useful in my trousers – in fact I’ve got a pretty impressive seven-incher – it’s more to do with my unusual looks.

I have a really big nose – think Barry Manilow and then add a couple of extra inches – and most fit women run a mile when I come on to them.

But I have found a few women who are strangely attracted to my big hooter and I use it to the best of my ability by bonking babes with my “nasal knob”.

I do get some satisfaction from this, but now I’m starting to worry there may be some health risks involved with this.

Should I use some kind of a nose condom? I THINK the only problem you’ll have is a permanent whiff of minge in your nostrils. I PULLED two crackers at a club in my local town.

They were both blonde and in their early 40s – and they were as dirty as a dog’s arse!

I bought them a few drinks and then we got a cab back to my place.

They stripped off and I watched as they put on a lesbo show for me – licking each other out.

By then I was rock-hard and I got a grip of one of them and boned her from behind while the other licked my bollocks.

They then both sucked me off in turn and I ended up splashing my steaming hot ball brew on their faces.

I’ve shagged them a few times since, but the problem is that they now want £50 each for any future sessions!

I’m half tempted, because I’m 50 and I haven’t got a chance of pulling more birds like these.

What do you think?

GS, Essex

Bexie says…

ONLY if you can afford it. NL, Leeds MB, Devon