Peer Support Is Vital
Cher yl and Chris Ives have cared for their daughter Natasha since she was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder in her teens, likened to be a cross between bipolar disorder and schizophrenia.
“Tasha lived with us until she was 25, when we realised that she really needed more independence in order to learn life skills,” explains Cher yl. “She went to live in a council flat and then onto a little home with a garden that we own. She is ver y close by and we see her vir tually ever y day. We are there for her 24/7, whenever she needs us.
“It has been a long journey and the early years in par ticular were a nightmare scenario. Even 30 years later, we don’t always get it right. It can be like treading on eggshells.
“Tasha’s life is not what we wished for her. She was a ver y gifted dancer and intended to make dance her career but all her hopes and dreams have disappeared.
“It is really hard for us as parents, too, to realise that all the ordinar y things that ever ybody takes for granted, she has lost out on. When she is ill it is not easy, but she is a lovely, delightful person when she is well.
“It has taken a physical and mental toll on us over the years. There have been times when I have gone fairly well down and in fact I have had some counselling myself.
“Chris and I have always worked as a team. It has been so hard for us; we do not know what we would have done without each other. For over 21 years we have also been volunteer coordinators of a local carers suppor t group.
“The Rethink Mental Illness charity has been a wonder ful suppor t to us since Tasha got ill. We became involved with the group because we wanted to give something back to them.
“I also volunteer on the telephone suppor t line,” says Chris. “We listen to the carer or ser vice user, and then with the knowledge we have built up of what’s available nationally and locally, we signpost that person to what best meets their needs.
“Callers are talking to someone who is also a carer and can understand their position and have empathy with the problems they are facing. Our group is primarily a carers group and that peer suppor t is absolutely vital.”