Moving Back In
My daughter has been working abroad for over two years and now is coming home in a few weeks. She says she is going to stay with me and maybe go to university. I am so worried, as she never got out of bed when she was here at Christmas, and wants to eat funny food, as well as criticising me for not eating vegetables or fruit. n it is now often the norm that grownup children come back home to live with their parents while they change direction in their lives. your daughter seems to be someone with a zest for life. Working abroad, experiencing a new culture does inevitably lead to changes in diet and fashion. She has grown as well, wanting to go to university and expand her horizons further. So this is a good thing.
it’s a compliment to you that she trusts you, feels safe with you and wants to live with you. What is not so great is that you also have a life of your own and have got used to that! So there will have to be adjustments on both sides.
Be positive about her life and diet – it may have benefits for you. Lay down some ground rules about her contribution to you sharing your home. Will she pay rent? Or will she contribute in other ways such as cooking regularly or doing some washing and cleaning? you must let her know that she is welcome but that she must also contribute now she is an adult. Be interested in her future and tell her about yours. Encourage her to grow and look forward. try to embrace or at least try out her ideas. Even though she is a young adult, this is a phase and it will change again. it’s good to be part of all the phases, even if some are more challenging than others…
Try to embrace or at least try out her ideas