Her Fiancé’s Mother Is Not Interested
My daughter is getting married next year and we’ve been having lots of fun planning the wedding. However, the only problem is her future mother-in-law. When asked what colour she would be wearing – so that no-one clashes – she told us that she hasn’t made up her mind yet. She seems to be showing no interest whatsoever in any of the plans and hasn’t volunteered to help with a single thing. Why is she being such a pain?
Weddings are exciting but also terrifying and can become a battleground if you let them. It is your daughter’s wedding, so as her mother, you are in pole position, since most of the planning will be done by you and your daughter. Clearly you are enjoying every second! But there may be other relatives in the frame who don’t want to get over-involved for fear they might tread on your toes. Weddings can bring out the monster in the gentlest of us! That said, the mother-in-law’s role is less “out there” than yours, but still significant, so you are right to try to involve her.
About colour, why don’t you take charge and instead of being disappointed by her lack of reply, simply let her know the colour theme for the bridesmaids and your chosen colour. She can then decide what colour is right for her, knowing what to avoid.
As for her help, I would leave that to her son. He will know what is possible and be the one to broker any request for financial or practical help.
The future mother-in-law may well be feeling left out and not know how to get in on the act, so I would enlist your future son-in-law to smooth any ruffled feathers at the outset. This is a good insurance policy for a great day.
The future mother-in-law may be feeling left out and simply not know how to get involved