His Head Is Stuck In The Sand
My husband and I are both in our late 50s and heading towards retirement. I’ve suggested making a few changes (that would help us in the future) to the house while we’re both still earning, but he won’t hear of it. I thought I was planning ahead by wanting to put in a shower and toilet downstairs, but he simply won’t discuss the possibility. We’re going to need it one day! What can I do to make him see sense?
So many of us are in that situation – living longer, hoping for a happy, healthy retirement. But I understand your desire to plan – as we all should.
It makes sense to make changes while you are earning, and a downstairs shower/toilet would be a significant boon if stairs become an issue – as well as increasing the value of your property!
Have you had a realistic conversation about how you both see your future? Perhaps your husband thinks you might move in retirement instead? Have you asked him? Maybe he just doesn’t want to think that far ahead.
If this is the reason, it might be time to involve another family member or even a financial advisor to go through your options. Knowledge is power. Do you have any friends who have done a similar thing? It might be the thought of building work and “fuss” that is putting him off.
You do need, however, to have that conversation. When does he think he will retire? Does he want to move then? How and where does he see you both in 10 years’ time? Has he thought about it? Does he have any hobbies to fill his time? What happens if one of you becomes ill?
Tell him how you see the future and explain why you want to make a few changes – if he can avoid putting his head in the sand, you both stand to gain.
You need to have this conversation. Where does he see you both in 10 years’ time?