ASK HELEN
As someone who has been a social worker, mother, wife and divorcee I have been around the block a few times. I’m humbled to answer your questions and feel that if a problem can be shared it can be halved – at the very least.
I’m So Fearful For My Grandson
Our lovely grandson is eleven and I used to collect him from school and keep him at our house until his mum picked him up after work. He’s getting a bit old for this now and wants to be able to play with his friends at his house after school. What’s giving me sleepless nights is the four busy roads he has to cross on his way home from school. My husband says he’s a sensible lad but I’m worried sick. Should I say something to his mother?
GChildren do grow up faster these days and he will, I’m sure, be aware of the dangers
randchildren are so precious, and it’s natural to worry about them and their safety, especially as you have been so involved in his early growing years. The worst thing is worrying on your own without having a precise knowledge of the situation, so yes, I would certainly discuss your concerns with his mother. Four busy roads are a lot for any of us to manage, so I can understand your anxiety. However, it is highly probable your daughter will have thought about this already. I’m sure they will have walked the route together and worked out how to cross the roads in question. There may be a lollipop person plus he’s likely to be with a friend for added security. I agree eleven is an in-between kind of age. He is no longer a toddler, but not quite a teenager yet either! Children do grow up faster these days and he will, I am sure, be aware of dangers. You are right to worry about him and right to talk it through with his mother. But if he is “a sensible lad”, it seems your grandson has been brought up with love and care that has made him well versed in the dangers of life. At some point it will be beneficial for you to “let go” of the things you can’t control and reassuring yourself of the safety elements in place is part of that process.