Cancer patient sank into depression while isolating and ‘felt like ending it’
... BUT SUPPORT FROM MACMILLAN AND FAMILY HELPED AJ TO BOUNCE BACK
A NOTTINGHAM grandad has spoken about falling into suicidal depression after losing his job and being diagnosed with cancer during the pandemic.
Alan-jay Minors of Sherwood was diagnosed with prostate and bladder cancer last year.
The 63-year-old, who is known as AJ, said he had been experiencing blood in his urine in August, and during a check-up a growth was found.
In September, surgery was carried out to remove some of the growth and it was confirmed to be stage 3 cancer.
“It took me for a loop at the followup. When they told me, I just couldn’t believe it,” he said.
“I thought the operation would take care of it.”
AJ was told the best option would be to remove his prostate and bladder completely as the cancer could be recurring, or alternatively he could try a two-year treatment plan, which he opted for.
He had been working as a supervisor at a golf course, but just three weeks after his diagnosis, he was made redundant due to the pandemic.
With his wife, Anita, also out of work, the couple began struggling with debt.
AJ said: “I didn’t know how I was going to cover all the direct debits, car payments. The £74 a week from Employment and Support Allowance (ESA) was just gone.
“My wife is a mental health nurse, but she had a fall and was on half pay.
“I’ve been active all my life, playing golf, cricket, football,” AJ said.
“But I was told now I would have to isolate and I just got really depressed, with everything and the pandemic.
“Not having my mind occupied, I couldn’t find the motivation and I just felt like I was going to die from cancer anyway.
“I really did feel like ending it.” AJ reached out to cancer support charity Macmillan where, after sharing his story, he was passed on to the Macmillan Money and Work team in Nottinghamshire.
They were able to help him navigate the complicated benefits system and also apply for a hardship grant to help pay his bills.
“I felt a lot better after talking,” AJ said.
“But my wife, son and daughter were also there for me.
“I have always been an optimist and try to see the glass half full. It was just about trying to keep positive. I will keep going, no matter what it takes.”
Last year, Macmillan gave out more than £43,700 of means-tested grants to families on low incomes in Nottingham, to help pay for costs brought on by cancer such as travel to hospital appointments.
The charity was able to offer a one-off payment of £350 to AJ to help him financially, while also still offering regular emotional support.
AJ, who moved with his wife to Nottingham from Bermuda in 2012 to be closer to his family, said now his focus is just taking one day at a time, and looking forward to returning to the golf course when restrictions lift.
“I do feel sluggish at times due to the cancer, but that’s why I can’t wait to get back out on the golf course,” he said.
“I’ve had my Covid19 vaccine and not been going many places.
“I feel I have been able to accept my diagnosis now, and have sup- port.
“I feel fortunate that I have a chance of survival. I will find out in a few months if the treatment is working.
“I’m not going to dwell on the future, but just live for today.” Macmillan reports that more than a third of people with cancer (39 percent) are severely financially impacted by their diagnosis and it expects demand to increase as a result of the pandemic. Macmillan Money and Work advisor Kate Dolman, who supported Alan said: “As the current lockdown continues, we want to remind everyone that Macmillan is here to help, whatever it takes. One way is with a Macmillan grant to help pay for the little things that can make a big difference to the lives of people living with cancer, especially at the moment. Imagine your washing machine has broken, or you can’t pay your heating bill, or you need to buy a blender because cancer treatment means you are having trouble eating but you can’t afford one.
“Macmillan are only a phone call away and are waiting to help you.”
To find out more about Macmillan grants including who can apply, contact Nottinghamshire Macmillan Money and Work advisers on 01274 987 600 (Monday to Friday, 9am5pm) or email Moneyworkreferrals@macmillan.org.uk. You can also call the Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00 (seven days a week) and talk to the Macmillan Welfare Rights Team, or visit macmillan.org. uk/grants.
The Macmillan Support Line also has specially trained nurses and cancer information specialists who can provide dvice, as well as emotional support, to help people with cancer cope with the additional strain of the coronavirus pandemic.
I feel I have been able to accept my diagnosis now, and have support ... I’m not going to dwell on the future, but just live for today
AJ Minors