Sleeping With A Demon
● Nicholas seemed a natural with kids ● Abusive monster killed 1-year-old Kam ● Cops thought I’d helped my evil fella
With two kids from two failed relationships by the time I was 20, I didn’t think anyone would want me.
So when I met Nicholas Kirnon, 20, on a night out back in 2006, I thought I’d struck gold.
He was a natural with my sons, Thierry, then 3, and Kamran, 1.
We’d only been together a few months when he was playing on the floor with the boys one day. ‘Dadda!’ Kamran beamed. To my relief, Nicholas smiled. After six months together, Nicholas offered to help with childcare. He was unemployed, while I worked part-time at a local bookies.
‘Thierry’s at nursery most of the time anyway,’ Nicholas said.
I was nervous at first. But, a few weeks in, things seemed great.
I always came home to a tidy flat and the boys ready for bed.
On 10 May 2007, I said goodbye to Kam. ‘Bye, Kam Kam!’ I waved. He smiled and waved back. I got the bus into Birmingham and started my shift.
At around 11am, my phone rang. It was Nicholas.
‘It’s Kam,’ he said. ‘You need to get to the hospital, now.’
When I arrived at Heartlands Hospital, Birmingham, Nicholas was being taken away by police.
‘They think I killed Kam,’ he said to me.
I ran inside. My mum and sister were already there.
Mum shook her head and I just knew. Kamran was gone.
I fell to the floor screaming. Then, nurses took me to a room where more police were waiting.
‘Do you feel up to coming to the station?’ one asked. ‘We need to ask you a few questions.’
At Sutton Coldfield station, I spoke to two female officers.
I thought they were just trying to establish the facts before they let me go. But I was wrong.
‘I’m arresting you for gross negligence and knowing or allowing a child to die,’ one said. ‘I don’t understand?’ I gasped. I spent the night in and out of
Mum shook her head and I just knew. Kamran was gone
gruelling police interviews.
‘Did you kill your son?’ they asked. ‘You killed him then went to work, didn’t you?’
By the end, I was screaming for them to stop.
My heart was shattered. Losing a son was a pain like no other.
Being accused of killing him was a true nightmare.
At court the next morning, I was sent to prison.
I was locked up until the next hearing in nine days’ time.
Eleven days after Kam’s death, I was granted bail. But I couldn’t go home, as so many people were potential witnesses for me at trial.
Through my solicitor, I found out I didn’t really know Nicholas at all.
‘He recently served a year in prison,’ my solicitor said. ‘And he was violent to an ex.’
Seeing Kam’s post-mortem report was the final wake-up call.
His little body had been covered in bruises. His liver and spleen were ruptured. He also had a four-week-old bleed on his brain – a sign that abuse had been going on before the murder.
At Birmingham Crown Court in February 2008, I stood in the dock with Nicholas, charged with manslaughter and allowing the
death of | a child. Nicholas was charged with murder. Prosecutors said I knew Nicholas was abusing Kam.
But the judge ruled there was no evidence against me, and directed the jury to find me not guilty.
The judge ordered Nicholas to be retried alone that June.
He appeared at Birmingham Crown Court, charged with murder.
He pleaded not guilty, saying Kam had fallen off the sofa.
But Kirnon was found guilty. He got life, with a 17-year minimum.
Rebuilding my life was hard. In September 2008, I met Noel, now 29. But it was a long time before I introduced him to Thierry.
We welcomed baby Savannah in 2011, and Porshah in 2012, and we married that same year. Life is full and happy. But I’m still wracked with guilt for letting Kirnon into our lives. And without my darling Kam, a piece of my heart will always be missing.
Innocent, by Sarah Rose, is published by Ebury and available to buy now for £6.99. Also, see her charity page at www.sharing kamscuddles.com
My heart was shattered. It was a pain like no other
MY DARLING KAM A PIECE OF ME IS STILL MISSING