Aisle be there FOR YOU
Bridget Herrmann, 41, has splashed out thousands on weddings but has never actually tied the knot...
Gazing at my reflection in the mirror, I admired the black gown hugging my figure. With a chiffon bow tied at the back and a sexy slit in one leg, the dress was perfect – my favourite so far.
Only, as the other bridesmaids teared up, trying on their dresses in the Chicago bridal shop, I felt out of place.
Another one to add to the collection, I thought.
I’d been there, done that – 11 times over! Although I’d also been maid of honour at three other weddings, too.
I still had a few of the bridesmaid dresses hanging in my wardrobe to prove it.
The rest were in my childhood bedroom or donated to charity – mainly the ones that looked like prom dresses.
Yet it wasn’t just the dressing up that kept me accepting bridesmaid offers.
I loved showing up for my friends and helping them plan their special days.
But I’ve never had one of my own.
I guess you could say that just like
Jane from
Dresses, I’m always the bridesmaid, never the bride. While only a few people have made that connection – I was doing this two years before the film!
I was first asked to be a bridesmaid in 2006.
My best friend from secondary school, Mary, took me out for dinner one evening to celebrate her engagement.
‘Obviously you’ll be in the wedding, too,’ she said casually.
I was gobsmacked, but there was no way I’d have said no.
‘Of course I’ll be your bridesmaid!’ I exclaimed.
I was honoured to be chosen. And my first time being a bridesmaid went smoothly.
I organised a wedding shower instead of a bachelorette party – sending out invites to guests and collating the gift registry.
Being so young, our parents helped with the planning, too – my mum Michale, 65, made all the flower arrangements.
Thankfully, the dress I wore was beautiful. A floor-length, sage green satin gown.
And watching my best
friend tie the knot was lovely. There were no slip-ups – the ceremony was plain-sailing. Only, I did have to put in some extra graft as a bridesmaid, moving furniture back into place afterwards. But from my first time being a bridesmaid, I knew that I’d love to do it again.
While it’s less stressful to just be a guest, I loved playing a part in making someone’s big day special. It was the best way for me to show up for my friends. While I knew that my sister Julia, 43, would eventually get married, I never expected to become a bridesmaid in high demand. Over the years, my friends from school, university and work started tying the knot. And every time, I received a bridesmaid offer. In 2010, I was asked to be a bridesmaid three times in one year by my friends Chelsea, Suzie and Rose.
Oh God, I’m going to have say no, I thought. Or worse, I’ll have to change in the back of a taxi!
Then, I’d be just like Jane from 27 Dresses!
Luckily, their weddings were all at different times.
Only now, my friendships were becoming expensive.
Forking out between £120 and £220 on new bridesmaid dresses every time, that price didn’t include alterations! Being only 5ft 1inch tall, every dress swamped me.
So, heading to a seamstress named Pat, I brought in a new dress for her almost every year.
One time, Pat’s son was there.
‘You’re the girl with all the bridesmaid dresses!’ he laughed. ‘You’re the one who put me through college.’
And it was no surprise to me – alterations cost a good £50 to £100 extra each time.
That wasn’t even adding the price of two-night hotel stays onto my total bill either.
Per wedding, I’ve spent up to £2,000 on the whole shebang, including the dress, the hotel, travel and wedding gifts.
Luckily, my friends haven’t tied the knot too far from home – the furthest I’ve had to travel is New Orleans and New York.
While splashing the cash was frustrating at first, especially if it wasn’t on a dress I’d usually pick, I knew my friends would do the same for me.
Although none of my dresses have been downright awful, my least favourite was a strapless, long green satin dress my friend picked for me.
We have completely different styles and her mum wanted the skirts to be fuller.
But when the chiffon layers were added, it looked awful!
Still, I kept a tight lip. I didn’t want to get in the way of my friend’s special day.
And even now, we can look back on it and laugh.
Now that I’m 41, the pace of weddings has slowed – most of my friends are married now.
Only, I’ve racked up a £10,000 bill being their bridesmaid, despite not having my own wedding.
While I’ve brought dates with me to weddings over the years, I’ve not found my Mr Right yet.
But being a bridesmaid 12 times and maid of honour three times hasn’t got me down.
Especially as I haven’t had to put up with any bridezillas.
Although I did earn a few disapproving looks when I challenged one bride on her bachelorette choices.
Luckily, the biggest disaster I’ve had to contend with as a bridesmaid has been the rain.
Holding umbrellas over the bride and ferrying furniture inside wasn’t too difficult.
But that hasn’t put me off wanting my own wedding.
I’d still love to get married, and I froze my eggs three years ago so I can start a family.
Because I’ve pulled out all the stops for my friends, they’re bound to do the same for me.
Just like Jane in 27 Dresses, I’ll invite all the friends I’ve been a bridesmaid for to mine.
Although I hope that instead of a bridesmaid dress, I’ll be the one in a big, white gown.
I’ve spent around £10k on friend’s weddings