I want to break up with my boyfriend but he still has strong feelings for me
QWhen I first met my boyfriend, he was fun to be with and caring. For the past few months though, things have been strained between us and we spend a lot of our time together arguing. I suggested that we should split up, but he then gets all ‘hurt’ and says he loves me. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but I really need A to split up with him.
: If it’s over for you – then the relationship is over. Unfortunately, I suspect there is not going to be an easy and painless way for you to make this split, especially as it seems he still has feelings for you.
All you can do is be direct with him and make it clear, gently, that you want the relationship to end. Stay calm and explain that you’re unable to return his feelings and that, as such, you see no future for the relationship. Hopefully, he’ll be able to accept this and move on; though, as I hinted above, I think he will be hurt.
QAMy ex-fiancé recently emailed me and said he really wants us to try again.
I was very much in love when we split two years ago, so I am not sure how I feel about this. The other problem is, I have started to see someone else. It took me a long time to feel ready for another relationship and I have only just started to feel happy again. What should I do? You need to think carefully about this and not let your emotions take over. I can’t decide for you, but I can suggest a few things that you may need to consider before deciding. Do you still have feelings for him? What motivated him to want to come back to you now? You say that things with the new man you are seeing are looking good and that he’s making you happy, so now may not be the time throw it all away. If you feel that you have a real chance of developing a loving relationship with him, perhaps your ex should remain just that?
Write to Fiona Caine c/o Hollie Busby, 1000 Lakeside, North Harbour, Portsmouth PO6 3EN or hollie.busby@jpimedia.co.uk Fiona regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence, nor pass letters on to other readers.