Having to choose my favourite mug, I was forced to hide the rest

Do you have a favourite mug? One that you look for when it’s not in the cupboard. A mug that is the perfect size for you and the beverage you like. Surely this is an age and stage thing. I don’t remember being in my twenties and having a favourite mug. Now I have a top-five. Depending on what I’m drinking and when I’m drinking. I hope it’s not connected to the fact that my children are older so my brain is filling the void. Spare gigabytes that have been freed up, now I’m not a taxi, chef, CEO and health expert. I think minor issues may have filled the void.

In a recent clear out of kitchen chaos, I have been forced to answer the questions that I avoid at all costs. ‘Do you ever use this?’ Followed by, ‘Which one’s your favourite?’

I am a massive fan of mugs with advertising on them. Anything from a plumber's merchant, building companies or roof felt suppliers.

These are the ones I like. The ones that some people don’t like giving to visitors. They’re the right size. Right colour. Right, feel. After a frenzied kitchen tidy-up by my wife I was ‘forced’ to make some decisions.

I was not a victim in this situation although I was a little bit scared.

I did the thing that all empowered men do. I behaved with the responsibility of a grown adult. Confident. Secure. Independent. I chose my mugs and hid the others in the garage and claimed that I’d given them to charity. Yes. That’s how men roll these days.

Don’t worry if you think I’ll get caught. They’re in a box labelled Christmas decorations.