7 ways to stay mentally strong!

Easy moves that help build resilience – it’s like weight lifting for the mind!

Simple steps to boost your wellbeing

We’ve all had our tough moments over the past year, those times when feeling mentally robust and being positive has been a bit of a hard row to hoe. Now that winter is about to hit, we need to keep ourselves feeling confident and optimistic enough to deal with whatever happens next. But can we teach an old(ish) brain new tricks? Apparently, we can! ‘Fairly recently, researchers found the brain to be more changeable than we realised,’ says mindfulness therapist Amy Malloy. ‘Which means little daily habits can often make a big difference over time.’ Enough said – let’s crack on!

1 THINK POSITIVE

It’s unclear why those who think positively gain a whole raft of benefits, but it seems that they do. From lowering depression and coping with stress to upping immunity and helping us live longer, positivity has unrivalled benefits. ‘Often, we treat negative thoughts as a problem and we think we should be feeling positive, so our first instinct is to try and push them away or go around in circles until we fix them,’ says Amy. ‘Actually, the key is to stop pushing them away. When we stop labelling a negative thought as negative and give ourselves permission to experience both comfortable and uncomfortable feelings, it can take

away the sting. It then becomes easier to notice the little things around us that are beautiful in life.’

AMY SUGGESTS:

Pop a notepad by the kettle and try these activities for a couple of weeks every time you make a cup of tea…

● Today I am thankful for… Write down or say out loud to yourself three things that you are grateful for or that felt good to experience. There’s lots of evidence to support that bringing thankfulness consciously into your mind and heart has a positive effect on the brain.

● Today I am brilliant at… Imagine you’re talking to your best friend. Write down three things that you’ve done brilliantly that day. Even if it’s just finally getting round to tackling that pile of ironing.

● Today it is okay that… Write down three feelings or situations that you notice yourself pushing away or wishing were different. After each one, add: ‘But actually, maybe that is okay for now.’ Observe how you’re feeling after doing this. After a couple of weeks, read back over the notepad and see what you find out and how you feel.

Amy Malloy is the founder of No More Shoulds, a social enterprise simplifying access to yoga and mindfulness for better mental health. Find your practice with her at amysyogaclub.com

2 PRACTISE GRATITUDE

Never thought being grateful could help you grow your mental strength? Trust us, it definitely does. ‘Expressing gratitude brings a sense of calm and peace,’ says psychologist Ruth Williams. ‘Our nervous system is slowed down and our anxiety levels drop as we feel a connected appreciation for the little things around us. When we express gratitude for other people and the outside world, we’re more able to feel the same for ourselves. This builds our self-esteem, the core of a resilient mindset.’

TRY RUTH’S IDEA:

‘Create a gratitude jar that invites you to think about and note down what you’re grateful for,’ says Ruth. ‘Place a jar saying Gratitude Jar or simply Thank You by the door so it’s not forgotten, along with bits of paper and a pen, and get everyone to jot down things they’re grateful for. Then, at a special time, maybe New Year’s Eve, you can read together or alone what everyone has been grateful for during the year.’

The Mind Remedy: Discover, Make And Use Simple Objects To Nourish Your Soul (Leaping Hare Press) by Ruth Williams is out now.

4 SWITCH OFF

Nothing leaches away mental strength more than calls, texts and alerts that ping. ‘We all know the importance of downtime, and most of us crave moments where we can quieten the noise and just breathe,’ says author and speaker Angela Lockwood. ‘What we forget is that we are in control of the noise we allow to enter our lives – and it all starts with regaining control of our devices.’ HOW TO DO IT: Turn off notifications. ‘By doing this, we minimise the bombardment of distractions and focus on what is important right here and now,’ says Angela. Determine what device functions are important to your life, such as text messages and missed calls. Turn off social media notifications and apps that add no value to your day, such as app updates or website deals.

Switch Off (Wiley) by Angela Lockwood is out now.

CALM IT DOWN:

Forest therapy guide Caitlin

Keddie suggests a calming out-of-office automatic message. Hers reads: ‘Please note that this inbox is a CALM inbox and is only checked once in the AM and once in the PM. I will do my best to respond to your message within 24 hours, unless it’s the weekend, then you can expect to hear from me on Monday.’ As Caitlin explains: ‘I was experiencing such high volumes of emails that I was becoming glued to a screen at night. I’ve noticed that my mailbox is now more relaxed and it hasn’t greatly affected the amount of enquires

I get, as it sets clear expectations. It helps me feel less frazzled.’ CAITLIN’S TIP: Add an emergency phone number to your out-of-office.

Caitlin Keddie is a forest therapy guide; forest-therapy-scotland.com

5 LEARN TO MEDITATE

There’s a whole tick list of mind benefits linked to meditation, including more clarity, focus and calm, as well as an easing of depression, anxiety and irritability. But studies are also revealing that meditation helps mental resilience.

HOW TO DO IT:

● Choose a time. There’s no pressure, it’s your call, but keep it regular every day. Now, find a comfy chair where you can sit with a long spine and feet flat on the floor. Set a timer for five minutes.

● Close your eyes or find a spot just in front of you on which to softly focus. Relax your jaw; now breathe in and out

through your nose. Don’t bother to count, just focus on the length of your breaths.

● Add some words to focus on. Perhaps ‘in’ as you inhale and ‘out’ as you exhale. Keep breathing and, if thoughts arise, take your focus back to your breath.

● After five minutes, open your eyes and turn your attention back to the room you are in and what’s happening around you.

● Repeat daily. Mark this on your calendar and commit to doing it every day for a month. We reckon it will be a habit in a couple of weeks and soon become a must-do! Don’t fret if you don’t ‘get it’ at first. It will come.

For more help, download the Headspace app.

6 WALK WITH TREES

We know that walking is good for us, but walking among trees is especially beneficial for our mental wellbeing. Research has revealed that forest therapy can improve our health on many levels, helping lower stress, reduce blood pressure, lift depression and improve mental health.

HOW TO DO IT:

First, find your trees. This can be a forest or just a patch of trees near your home. Turn off your phone and find a spot where you can sit comfortably, preferably against a tree. Become aware of your breathing – maybe count in for four and out for four – but don’t stress about it. As well as being relaxing, some of the trees you encounter give off volatile essential oils that (like in aromatherapy) help to reduce the production of our stress hormone, cortisol. Keep sitting (or if you find this tricky, gently walk) for around 30 minutes and notice what’s around you: light through the branches, birdsong, leaves rustling. Return to the trees often, checking their changes through the seasons. Weekly is ideal, or daily if you are near a park or woods.

7 SET AN INTENTION

Yoga and meditation experts often set an intention or affirmation before their daily practice. ‘Setting intentions can help develop mental resilience, as they instruct the brain to direct its energy to fulfilling them,’ says mind coach Isabella Venour. ‘We take in a lot of information during the day, so this practice focuses the mind and reminds us of what is important as opposed to things we can’t control or that didn’t go to plan.’

HOW TO DO IT:

Start early. ‘After breakfast, I set my intention for the day. I do this by asking myself what one feeling or focus I want to commit to,’ says Isabella. ‘Maybe I was restless yesterday, so today I want to slow down and take small, consistent steps. Perhaps I’ve been struggling to complete a task, so my intention is to start with the biggest challenge and get rid of distractions. I encourage clients to link their intentions to their wider life and work goals. If we set intentions, we can quickly re-evaluate what’s important, check the options available to us and move forward.’