ANNA ABOUT TOWN

Anna Friel talks groundbreaking roles, success in the US and why she’s not going to let fear rule her love life

After 20-plus years of inhaling Marlboro Lights, Anna Friel has recently taken up vaping. ‘I’ve started going to a shop near where I live in Windsor,’ she says. ‘And what I’ve discovered,’ she adds, stifling a giggle, ‘is that I like creamy, milky textures. None of these fruity ones!’ she grins, wagging a French fry in the air like a finger. ‘But yeah, if you’re wondering who’s keeping all the vape stores in business, it’s the likes of me, going, “Ooh! What turbo is that, then?”’ We’re sitting in an old-school Maida Vale pub; Friel with a glass of Diet Coke in hand, having lunch. Although she hasn’t had a cigarette today – or a vape, for that matter – the actress is, she admits, still smoking. ‘Just the odd one. Mostly it’s when I’ve had a drink or when I’m on set – that’s a joining thing,’ she explains. ‘It’s always when you go for a smoke with someone that you end up having a big old conversation. But you know,’ she says, as if reasoning with herself, ‘I am drinking less.’ Lately, she’s started watering down her wine. ‘Just the white. It’s a good tip, actually – swap the soda in your spritzer for S.pellegrino or Perrier.’ And to further offset any wrongdoing, she’s still drinking her sworn-by daily morning shake – an antioxidant-rich combination of walnuts, vegetables, flaxseed, coconut oil and frozen berries. So, who’s she trying to persuade? Friel pretends to groan inwardly. ‘You sound like my brother – he’s a doctor. He thinks I’m a complete idiot. But there can come a point when you feel too good,’ she says, chuckling. ‘I gave up smoking for two years, but it got to the point where I said to David [Thewlis, her ex and fellow actor], ‘I don’t do anything. I go to bed at 9pm. I wake up at 6am. I eat well, I exercise…’ At which point, we turned to each other and said,

“Oh go on, let’s have one, then.”’

After all these years in show business (29, to be exact), Friel hasn’t lost her sense of humour. On screen, she’s best known for playing a string of serious, often shadowy characters – most recently, a psychologically unhinged detective in the TV series Marcella – but in person I’m reminded far more of her rebel child of the 1990s, falling out of clubs with the Primrose Hill set. ‘It’s probably why I’m still a member of the Groucho,’ she rolls her eyes. ‘I can’t let that go. I’ve been paying my annual fees since I was 18, although I haven’t properly lived in London since I was 22. I lived in LA for years and still paid the direct debit,’ she says, making an amusingly baffled face.

These days, home is 20 miles from the capital in Windsor with Gracie, 13, her daughter with Thewlis. But every now and again, she’ll still find herself at the bar, ‘drinking the most expensive glass of red wine I’ve had in two years’. Has the clientele changed? ‘Not massively – it’s the same old crowd, minus the paparazzi.’

At the height of Friel’s tabloid heyday – the postBrookside years of her late teens – there was barely a day when she wasn’t seen through a long lens. Things calmed down when she initially moved to New York to appear on Broadway. ‘They were such rocky years,’ she says now, her Rochdale accent more intact than any US inflection. ‘And then I met David. He sort of took me by the horns and rescued me,’ she says, enveloping herself in a hug to explain. After four years together, they had Gracie then, in 2010 – after nearly a decade together – they split. For some years afterwards they lived opposite each other in Windsor, but Friel tells me Thewlis has since married, and divides his time between another nearby house and Paris.

Now, at 42, she’s single. She won’t quite talk about the specifics of who she’s been dating, although I mention that when Red last interviewed her, there had been somebody. She’s trying to do the maths. ‘I’d still say

I’ve had only three very serious committed relationships: Darren [Day, who she dated when she was 18], David, and then Rhys [Ifans, whom she dated for three-and-ahalf years and split from in 2014].’ Then there was ‘army guy’ – someone she was seeing for two years – and then ‘somebody else’. And now? She raises an eyebrow, a coy

‘IN MY TWENTIES, I TURNED DOWN ROLES I SHOULDN’T HAVE, AND I MISSED OUT ON SOME’

smile creeping on to her face. ‘Let’s just say I haven’t made my mind up yet.’

We meet at a time when it seems there’s lots to be figured out in Friel’s life. At home, she’s settled – ‘the house is finished. Gracie’s gorgeous’ – but at work, there’s a question hanging over her about whether to resume where she left off 10 years ago, living and working out of LA. Two days ago, she took a call regarding an offer for a new US role based there, ‘And the first question they asked me was, “How can we make it work for you?”’ she says. It’s evident from her expression that this hasn’t happened before. ‘No way! Ever since I had Gracie, no one has really said, “We know you’ve got a daughter, what can we do to get you out here again?”’

It’s indicative, she says, of how the landscape for actors who are parents is changing. ‘I think so many more actors are open about the fact their lives are dictated by children now, men and women. They don’t want to go away and work for long stints on TV series filmed in places they don’t live, and so a lot more of the work is coming back to LA.’ As a result, there are better terms: ‘It’s not, “You have to decide tomorrow about a six-year contract and you’ll have to live in Albuquerque,” as it once was.’ And so, after a prolonged period focusing primarily on British TV, she’s started thinking again. ‘But Gracie’s 13,’ she frowns. ‘A part of me just says, “I can’t.”’

It’s clearly a decision she’s losing some sleep over, at a time when Gracie is building her own life and craving independence. This summer, they holidayed separately for the first time ever and Gracie is ‘growing up’, Friel says. ‘Emotionally and physically, we’re at that stage.’ The night before we meet, they stayed together at a London hotel. ‘We try to make a thing of that. She comes when I’m working, and we do room service… this time, we had hot chocolate and whipped cream and fell asleep in each other’s arms, and we woke up that way. But I’m aware that can’t be for ever,’ she says, frowning again. ‘Although I’d like it to be. I did say, “If we can still do this, if you’re never too old for a cuddle with your mum, it will be okay.”’

Although Friel would classify herself as a single parent, it’s clear that it’s been important for Thewlis to play an active role in Gracie’s upbringing. When they separated, Friel had been starring in the US drama series Pushing Daisies but moved back to the UK for the sole reason of being near Thewlis. ‘The simple fact is I couldn’t take my child away from her father,’ she explains, ‘and that meant giving up Hollywood.’ Not that she’s one for regrets – or is, at least, too philosophical to say so. ‘We all have those Sliding Doors moments,’ she muses. ‘When I was in my 20s, there were roles I turned down that I shouldn‘t have, and things I missed out on.’ When I ask what those roles were, she cites Cameron Diaz’s part in Gangs Of New York, and the female lead in Fight Club. ‘I lost out to Helena Bonham Carter on that one, and quite rightly so. In fact, I think they were both cast correctly – I wasn’t ready.’

Instead of one big, life-changing moment, she seems to have achieved success in Hollywood on several occasions, with her most recent exposure to international audiences coming through Marcella. After beginning life as an ITV drama in 2016, the series found its way on to Netflix, and the following year Friel became the recipient of an Emmy Award for Best Actress. To say winning her first major international accolade came out of left field is an understatement: ‘But that’s TV for you now. I started off doing something I thought was very British, but it turns out everyone’s got little cinemas in their homes, and the Americans liked it.’

Her latest project, Butterfly, is another for ITV. In the three-part drama, she plays the mother of an 11-year-old boy who wants to permanently change gender, only to encounter resistance from his father (Emmett J Scanlan) and the surrounding community. It’s the kind of gruelling, gritty role that Friel excels in, but she talks of a different connection with the script. ‘For me, it just

took me back to Brookside and the kiss,’ she says of the now-iconic lesbian clinch that became a national talking point when she played Beth Jordache, after joining the show at 16. ‘It took me back to that moment, and the letters I’d get every single day, from people saying, “Please, please write back to me. I can’t speak to anybody.”’

‘It’s funny,’ she adds, ‘because now being gay is nothing. But back then, just that little bit of time ago, I’d walk down the street and it would be, “Lezza, you big dyke.” It was literally this,’ she says, kissing the back of her hand fleetingly, ‘but the homophobia was massive. And that’s sort of where I feel we’re at [accepting the transgender community]. We’re being open and talking about what it is to change gender, but I don’t know that there is true acceptance yet – not for the people living it.’

Written by Bafta award-winning writer Tony Marchant, it’s a heartwarming, emotional beast, and for Friel, a chance to play a more sympathetic parent than the one we see in Marcella – here, she’s staunchly protective and instinctive. In some ways, she says, the character is incredibly close to herself, and the younger actors that play her children are a similar age to Gracie. ‘Which blows my mind, because that’s the age I started acting. I was 13 when I did my first TV drama [playing Michael Palin’s daughter in G.B.H.], the same age as Gracie.’

In what seems the perfect cliché for a child of two actors, Gracie is already showing signs of wanting to follow her parents into the industry. ‘She has a talent, and can sing beautifully,’ enthuses Friel, ‘but I don’t know if she’s ready. Every now and again, David or I take her on set and after two hours it’s, “Can I go home now?” We’re trying to show her that if she wants to do this, she’s got to remember how hard it is.’ It doesn’t help, she thinks, that when it comes to fame and celebrity, she’s part of a different generation. ‘Now it’s always more, next… the new Kardashian. I hear so frequently, “I just want to be famous,” and I say, “Do you really? I really think you should think about that.”’

Those seeking fame would be wise to heed her advice, given she encountered it all so early on in her life. At certain points – notably the periods she dated Darren Day and Robbie Williams – Friel seemed to be followed incessantly by the red tops and, to some extent, there has always been media interest in her relationships. But if there was any bitterness towards the press, she’s since learnt to be sanguine. ‘I think for us, the old school, the Primrose Hill set, that sentence, to be able to say, “It’s tomorrow’s fish and chip paper,” well, it actually was,’ she says. ‘Now there’s social media, and I think for youth to have to live in a goldfish bowl and present a continually perfect life, that must be a huge stress and strain. I can’t say I would swap,’ she shudders. ‘No, definitely not. And anyway,’ she laughs, ‘what is there to say about my relationships? I’m best friends with my exes.’

This much is true: in previous interviews, she has spoken about how much she adores Ifans and Thewlis, and of the fact that she remains close to Ifans, speaking to him regularly. So, does this make her that rare species of woman who can stay mates with everyone she’s slept with? ‘Ha, maybe!’ What does she think is the secret? ‘I don’t know,’ she says, quite seriously. ‘I mean… with David, there was no money involved in our separation and we have a daughter, so maybe that helps things. But in both relationships, things didn’t break down because there was no love there. In reality, it was just because we’d become friends, or we were spending too much time apart, and that’s actors for you – that’s our industry. I mean, how many actors do you know that stay together?’ It’s sad, I say. ‘It is, but then, we’re idealists,’ says Friel. ‘We love the idealism of love and what we think we are, sort of in the same way that you can have it with social media – you can portray any kind of life you want.

And so, I just think we have to be more honest. I’ve definitely realised I need to compromise as I’ve gotten older – I was never very good at it.’

Clearly, there are lessons she’s learnt, and if there’s one thing she’s looking for in a relationship now, it’s ‘kindness’. She says complacency is ‘the death of any relationship’. But along the way, she’s also had to ‘get rid of fear’. What does she mean? ‘Well, that was a big thing. I’d always gone for men that were a lot older than me [Thewlis is

13 years her senior]. I used to think, ‘Oh my god, what if they leave you and go off with a 20-year-old?’

So, I think dating older guys was partly to avoid that.’

Now she’s in her 40s, of course, she sees friends in all different kinds of scenarios and they’re still getting divorced. ‘So, I try not to make rules for myself. I’ll be in a relationship for love – I’m not going to make a decision based on fear. I mean, look at Helen Mirren – I’m pretty sure she settled down in her 50s, so maybe that will be me.’

She grins. ‘It will all figure out,’ she says. It always does. Although you get the sense it won’t be today. For now, she’s off to attend to a couple of work matters before heading to the hotel spa and then she’ll be dashing to meet Gracie – maybe enjoying a little vape on the way… Butterfly airs in October on ITV1

‘I’LL BE IN A RELATIONSHIP FOR LOVE – I’M NOT GOING TO A MAKE A DECISION BASED ON FEAR. IT WILL ALL FIGURE OUT’