WANT TO REDUCE YOUR DEBT?

Clare shares how she got started

HOW TO FACE THE MUSIC

Getting a complete picture of your debts is, unfortunately, a necessary step. Check the balance of all your accounts and credit cards and write it all down. I’d recommend downloading an app where you can see all your accounts in one place, such as Money Dashboard. Remember this is fixable. You have all the information now.

OPEN UP

It’s very difficult to deal with debt on your own, keeping everything a secret. Talk to someone: it could be a trusted friend or family member or an organisation such as Stepchange (stepchange.org; 0800 138 1111) or the National Debtline (nationaldebtline.org; 0808 808 4000). They are there to answer your questions, help you build a budget and do things like arrange a debt management plan. You can also just confide in them; they’re completely judgement-free.

TALK TO YOUR BANK AND CREDITORS

It takes courage to pick up the phone but the sooner you feel ready to have those conversations, the sooner you’ll know what help is available to you. They may be able to offer financial advice, reduce your interest rate or refund fees and charges.

MAKE A BUDGET THAT WORKS FOR YOU

We need to stop thinking of a budget as being something that exists to restrict us and think of it as our own personal plan for staying in control of our finances. The most life-changing part of looking back over my income and outgoings over the past year was exposing a fundamental flaw in my budgeting technique: I would round income up and outgoings down. Those little discrepancies every month add up over time. Setting yourself a budget is not revolutionary, but it’s the thing that’s made the biggest difference. I do mine in a simple spreadsheet that lists our incomes and fixed outgoings, such as rent and bills. Then I know exactly how much we have for other expenses.

SEPARATE YOUR SENSE OF SELF-WORTH FROM YOUR DEBT

Change your language from ‘I’m in debt,’ which makes it sound like you’re at the bottom of a very deep hole, to ‘I have debt’, the same way you would say you ‘have’ a mortgage. It’s still yours to sort out, but it just removes that sense of self-loathing.

BE KIND TO YOURSELF

Remind yourself what you got right in life. You might have made a mess of your finances, and you have to take responsibility for that and be accountable, but try and frame it in the context of everything you’ve got right. For me, it’s my wonderful marriage and two children, some professional success and my great friends. When you’re feeling awful about things, or at a low point, it’s worth remembering that this is just one part of your life — and it’s always fixable.