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In our November issue, Candice Brathwaite mused on how, in the Black community, women are often expected to be silent and submissive. But, she explains, she’s determined to teach her daughter to speak up.

This resonated with Helen Lapentti, echoing experiences from her own life. ‘Like Candice’s husband, I come from a conservative background, mine being South American,’ she wrote. ‘My father in particular was very old-fashioned and domineering. I moved to England 23 years ago and, over time, I have learned to identify and recognise the challenges that such an upbringing has brought. However, it wasn’t until reading this article that I could recognise the impact that suppressing my opinions, purely because I’m a woman, has had on me. The article’s impact went further: it made me reflect and realise that it didn’t make my father a bad man, and it didn’t mean that he loved me any less than my brothers. It meant we were supposed to be two different people from the very beginning and that I wasn’t one to comply with his opinions. It also showed me that I was meant to eventually move away to develop my own personality and way of thinking. There is still a long way to go, but articles like this are valuable because they make us reflect and identify what can be changed in a positive way, without taking anything away from our cultural heritage. It is empowering and soothing all at once.’