Nobby know-it-alls
You’ve perhaps met one, you may have one in your club, or you’ve probably seen him on Facebook. He’s the expert. He knows it all.
Yes, we’ve all come across them, know-it-alls. I saw a Facebook thread a while ago, the subject of the ‘discussion’ was, which is the best Lambretta SX in the UK and its various merits. There was a long and tortuous thread with a whole bunch of people wading in with opinions. It is quite clear to me that very few people can actually claim to be any kind of definitive ‘expert’ in scooter brands, whether it be Lambretta or Vespa. They have been produced over many years and in many countries, with many versions, variants and factory anomalies. Surely not that many people could all be true experts and know absolutely EVERY last detail? I personally know a very small number of people, whom I’ve met over my 40 years tinkering with scooters, who I would consider to have an immense and detailed ‘expert’ knowledge… but that is often of a particular single model or small range, whether it be Luna Line, GPs or smallframe Vespas. There is someone who has maybe become a prolific collector and has developed an encyclopaedic knowledge, and could well tell you that the kick-start bolt is wrong, or the style of washer on a petrol tank is incorrect. Hardly anyone else would know, but one of these guys will. When customisation was the new ‘big thing’ this kind of interest and knowledge waned, but now, as ‘true’ restoration is a current trend peaking again, then more people have started to rediscover and attain that knowledge. They are collecting original literature, official drawings, factory blueprints etc., and that is helping them build this knowledge. They have built small collections or even museums. It is fantastic for us all to have these people in our midst.
However… for every one person that really is a true expert (or close to it) there are many more who are not true experts, they just think that they are! Sometimes those fellas can become bloody annoying as they impose their opinions on the rest of us, whether that be in person or on social media. I remember a dealer (well known for Vespa) who once made my ears bleed when he repeatedly and aggressively told me that I needed two springs for my stand when I was trying to buy a single (nice shiny) chrome one. I told him I didn’t need two, but he would not have it. He even became angry when I told him I thought he was wrong. He seemed to have the idea that because he was an expert (in a different brand) that of course his knowledge was superior. Being an impressionable 18-year-old, now doubting myself, unbelievably I walked out with two chrome springs! When it comes to dealers you would also naturally expect them to have a decent knowledge, by the fact that they are scooter dealers, but it’s certainly not a given. Not all dealers are created equal, I can tell you! I’ve heard dealers sprouting some absolute tosh over the years. One springs to mind who knew very little about the scooter world but had some rather deep pockets and ambitions to be an entrepreneur, and probably just saw scooterists as a ‘quick buck’. Of course, it all went very wrong for him in the end… but sadly also for a few customers along the way.
There are a couple of guys that I can think of, who have a truly amazing knowledge of particular models and a pretty good knowledge of the general ranges. I’m not just talking about what panels fit what, but can mentally recite knowledge like frame number sequences for year of manufacture, and whether it had type X or type Y air filter for that frame number sequence. If I was building or restoring a Luna Line model I know exactly who I would ask about the details, for example. But overall, I think my 40 years of experience have shown me that there are very few true experts of our chosen form of transport. You could probably fit them all into one room. But there are a tonne of people a couple of levels down who think that they know a heck of a lot… and many of them indeed do. But, unfortunately, there are infinitely more that really don’t… and they all seem to have a platform on Facebook! It might be an age thing but I find these frauds get easier to spot as I get older and I’m sure you’ve probably spotted some of them too.
As far as the purchase of my two springs goes… I don’t think I ever did fit that extra chrome spring, it was hung on a hook above my workbench for many years. A constant reminder to this day.