First it was the Poles, now here come the polar bears

ANOTHER week of madness on the migration front.

We’ve had armed Afghan stowaways f i ring shots at farmers in Staffordshire after jumping out of the back of a container lorry.

We’ve seen migrants from a village near Heathrow ferried up to Manchester in a £50,000 stretch limo.

And still there are plenty of people who insist that our immigration policy i s too strict and we should be letting in anyone who wants to come here.

What puzzles me is that all the migrants in the village near Heathrow claim to have travelled via Calais. As, presumably, have the armed Afghan desperadoes.

But we keep being told by the Government that we aren’t taking anyone at all from the camp at Calais. Someone’s not telling the truth.

Then there was the picture of a migrant stowed away alongside a polar bear. At least French police caught him.

But how do we know the polar bear wasn’t the real stowaway, claiming to be a refugee from global warming?

Soon we won’t able to move for polar bears being ferried around Britain in stretch limos , with mini-bars full of fish.

I wonder if Pixie Balls-Cooper would be interested in giving a home to a polar bear. once she gets round to keeping her promise to take in a Syrian migrant family, of course.

And finally, the last word on Benedict Cumberbatch’s demand that overcrowded Britain accepts an unlimited number of migrants comes f r om a r eader in Wolverhampton, who posted on Mail online:

‘ Tr y living in To we r Hamlets, Hamlet.’ MAIL reader Carol Owen writes from Chorley, Lancashire. On a recent trip to The Royal Botanic Garden, in Port Logan, Wigtownshire, she spotted the above elf ’n’ safety notice at the entrance. Since Carol had forgotten to take her hiking boots, she wondered if they’d let her in. She never knew grass was so dangerous.