AN INSPECTOR CALLS
THERE will soon be many more hotels like this in London. They’ll be small, smart and intimate — at the other end of the spectrum from the huge Hyatts and Marriotts. They will also be expensive. That’s the way the wind is blowing in the capital and here’s a classic of the genre.
The newly opened Zetter Townhouse Marylebone is a sister hotel to the two successful Zetters in Clerkenwell. It occupies the former home of Edward Lear, the eccentric poet (The Owl And The Pussycat) and artist, and is fittingly eccentric, with more than a nod to Sir John Soane.
That means busts and chunks of st one mounted on walls, interspersed with photographs of sporting teams, such as the Egyptian Cricket Club of 1923.
Under the cramped bar are old copies of Who’s Who and there’s a whole recess of miniature bottles of liqueurs. The lift is plastered in Punch magazine covers. It’s Brideshead meets Shoreditch and i t works remarkably well.
Our room is immaculate, oozing comfort with plenty of modern touches, but always mindful of i ts Georgian pedigree. Americans will love it — though I wonder if they will be drawn to this part of town just behind Marble Arch near the Edgware Road where every other woman seems to be wearing a burka.
There’s no restaurant as such, but chef Bruno Loubet has come up with an imaginative menu of nibbles and shared plates. At least we think it’s imaginative.
Trouble is that downstairs is so dark that we can’t read a word of what’s printed on brown A5 cards. We try leaning a candle towards the text, but that doesn’t work.
‘Do you happen to have a torch?’ I ask a waitress, whose English isn’t good enough to pick up on the request. Or perhaps it’s more a case of a torch being totally out of kilter with the vibe — which is all sultry and seductive.
‘Great place for a date,’ says my wife, staring at a tanned man in his 60s feeding slices of salami into the silky mouth of a woman half his age. She is absolutely not his daughter.
There’s no denying the buzz and the staff are doing their best. Give it a few weeks and things will calm down — and hopefully you won’t have to wait ten minutes for your glass of wine to arrive. Breakfast is a triumph and the room takes on a whole new persona with sunlight pouring through the south-facing windows. Three women are having a business meeting over perfectly cooked scrambled eggs and skinny lattes.
The frenetic pace of the night before has long gone, replaced by something sophist i cated and measured. Studious by day, scurrilous by night. Not a bad combination.
The Zetter Townhouse Marylebone 28-30 Seymour Street London W1H 7JB Tel: 020 7324 4544, thezettertownhouse.com Doubles (room only) from £258 per night