Confessional

What the vet really thinks about you

I’M USED to delivering bad news. It’s almost inevitable that your pet will die before you do, so every owner has to deal with it at some point. Most people tend to blink away the tears, but I’ve had some real breakdowns — often it’s dads, who realise they are going to have to tell the rest of the family.

The most heartbreaking owners are the older single women who can’t afford a string of operations on their sick 15-yearold terrier, but are talking about loans or even selling the house to fund treatment. I tell them it’s not worth it.

I’m also wary of the entitled, middleclass mums. Fluffy’s got cancer and mum is in the surgery with her crying children, demanding I ‘do everything in my power’ to make their terminally ill pet better.

Of course, I’ll do my utmost, but I won’t make promises I can’t keep. My concern is the animal, not its owner’s comfort.

What I hate most is requests for ‘convenience euthanasia’. Sometimes people are moving house and they ask me to put their pet down ‘humanely’. I always refuse if it’s a healthy animal and, yes, I do despise those people. We will sometimes re-home their animals — my two cats were rescue moggies.

People love their pets, but are often terrible at monitoring their diet. It’s incredibly frustrating when I give them recommendations, then their cute puppy comes back even more overweight.

Often, women who are the embodiment of healthy eating and go running every day will have these little waddling dogs. I think those owners are breathtakingly selfish.