Hardcastle
WHO said what here in 2016? My muchimitated seasonal quiz: 1) She congratulated Sir Mick Jagger on becoming a father again at 73, remarking: ‘I need to pick up a pregnancy test. I’m 936 weeks late!’ a) Jane Fonda b) Jerry Hall c) Bette Midler? 2) ‘I stopped drinking 45 years ago. I was a dissolute, guilt-ridden, self-pitying boozer.’ a) The Archbishop of Canterbury b) Barry Humphries c) Sir Michael Parkinson? 4) ‘I went to Oxford’s Ruskin College, got an economics degree at Hull university... and I’m an honorary professor in climate change.’ a) Graham Norton b) lord (John) Prescott c) Sharon Osbourne? 5) ‘I never go anywhere without Typhoo (tea) in my handbag…’ a) Nigella Lawson b) Glenda Jackson c) Her Majesty the Queen? 6) ‘I have just been advised by experts that if we leave the eu, the Angel of death will take the first born of each family.’ a) (Tory MP) Michael Fabricant b) ex-Chancellor George Osborne c) Nick Clegg? 7) ‘Do you ever listen to Women’s Hour? Goodness me did you ever hear such a dismal litany? Must be hell being a woman.’ a) BBC Director General Lord Hall b) Sir Nicholas Soames c) Germaine Greer? 8) ‘I can tell you that the one thing I really, really couldn’t bear when I was an MP were my constituents.’ a) david Cameron b) Zac Goldsmith c) Gyles Brandreth? 9) ‘By the way, all the time I was talking about my mother I could see your knickers.’ a) Donald Trump b) Alan Bennett c) Jeremy Clarkson? 10) ‘you’d have to pay a lot of money to get me into a nightclub – sniffing and snorting and dragging some trollop home with me.’ a) Jacob Rees-Mogg b) Julian Clary c) lord Sugar? 12) ‘I like to have a Korean bath, where you get scrubbed from top to bottom by fierce Korean ladies…’ a) Prince Charles b) Kim Jong un c) Helen Mirren? 13) ‘So I ran a hose from the kitchen all the way in here, filled up the water bed and then we thought, “Great, let’s have sex on a water bed!”’ a) Prince Harry b) Janet Street-Porter c) Nigella Lawson? 14) He was described as: ‘A spec-wearing, doggerel-spouting rock dinosaur who aggravates the masses.’ a) Sir elton John b) Bono c) Sir Cliff Richard? 15) ‘Nicola Sturgeon is the well-mannered, yet rampant lioness and we are her lucky cubs!’ a) Sir Sean Connery b) Billy Connolly c) Alan Cumming? Answers: 1c 2b 3c 4b 5a 6a 7b 8c 9c 10b 11b 12c 13b 14b 15c