My panic attack at thought of being a mother, by Kate from Countryfile
BBC wildlife presenter Kate Humble has said she had a ‘panic attack’ at the idea of becoming a mother.
The 48-year-old former Countryfile host said that during a discussion with her husband she broke down in tears at the thought of having children and knew in that moment motherhood was not for her.
She explained that she was lacking a maternal gene and insisted it had never been an issue for her or her husband of 25 years, Ludo Graham, 55.
Recalling a discussion about what would happen if one of them changed their mind, she said she had ‘what I can only describe as a panic attack’.
She told BBC 5 Live Daily: ‘I broke down in tears and said, “I cannot do it”. It was kind of a primeval response.
‘A primeval response, it was so strong’
I don’t know where it came from. It was so strong, and that was the moment that I thought, “I’m never going to change my mind”.’
The presenter has spoken previously about her decision and the stigma still surrounding childless women. She said: ‘By choice I have said I do not want to have children. And that still seems to be quite odd and you do still seem to be quite judged for it.’
She said it was important for her to talk about the topic in order to support other women who make the same decision.
‘It felt constructive, it felt like women could turn around and say, “At last there’s somebody there in the public eye who feels the same way we do”. Suddenly it’s becoming a topic of conversation,’ she said.
Miss Humble and her husband settled in South Wales in 2010 when they bought a farm in Wye Valley. The pair have created a business out of the working farm, previously holding festivals including the Big Day Out and hosting visits from Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall.
Miss Humble, who was president of the RSPB until 2013, strongly objected to any suggestions she had substituted motherhood with her commitment to animals. She said: ‘Absolutely not. I don’t want a substitute. I never wanted kids. This is a completely different thing. I find animals just endlessly fascinating, in the way that people find children endlessly fascinating.
‘For me, there is never a dull moment when you have an animal around.’
She has said that children terrified her – that she loved them, ‘but only when I can give them back’.