Rapunzel gave her prince the brush-off

We’ve all heard of Rapunzel — we’ve all heard of her, That princess in the tower, With hair right down to there.

She had a bit of a phobia, And it wasn’t just a phase, She never wanted to cut her hair So always had bad hair days.

If they ever mentioned cutting her hair, She’d stamp her feet and sob, So no one would ever suggest to her To have the Theresa May bob!

She was also a bit arrogant, And selfish to a ‘T’, In fact, it was said at the palace That she was all ‘me, me, me’!

She thought she was beautiful And could catch herself a fella Much quicker than Sleeping Beauty, Or even Cinderella.

But the truth was she was single And only thought of herself, It was surely a no-brainer That she was on the shelf!

Her father was fed up with her, Her antics made him wince, So he decided he would set out And find for her a prince!

He searched the land high and low, As they do in fairy tales, From Devon and Cornwall in the South Right up to the Yorkshire Dales.

At last, he found the very prince, After scouring all the land, And he was on a promise To take his daughter’s hand.

The journey back was hazardous, But assured it was worth the trip, After chopping down beanstalks, woods and trees And giving the odd witch the slip!

He slew a good few dragons Using his bare hands, To prove a suitable suitor, He had to make a stand!

At last, they reached the palace, The prince with a red rose flower, Called up to Rapunzel From the foot of the very high tower.

Rapunzel went to the balcony To look and see who was there, Then called down to the worn-out prince: ‘Not now, I’m washing my hair!’