Surely Clooney is no club fan
SO apparently Glasgow’s ideal golf companion is George Clooney, although predictably it was the female voters in the poll that swung it for George.
Honestly, though: why on earth would any woman want to play a round with Mr Clooney if it meant having to thole a golf club – the social organisation, I mean, not the things you hit balls with.
Out this week is the golf movie Tommy’s Honour, starring Peter Mullan and rising Scots actor Jack Lowden. One of its themes is how class-conscious the game used to be, typified by Sam Neill in muttonchops and top hat sneering to one of Scotland’s best-ever players that ‘your station in life was set before you were born!’.
Snobbish old putters belong in the past, but it took until this year for women to be allowed to join Muirfield – so let’s hope George could card in his golf companion, if they were unfortunate enough to have arrived with the wrong set of chromosomes.
And if you really admire someone, why would you take them golfing?
Even many golfers can’t stand golf clubs with their self-important committee members, officious secretaries, endless dress codes about what you can wear, and genuine tweedy whinges spotted on the club notice board such as, ‘I bow to no one in my admiration for our lady members, but their slow play is holding up gentlemen,’ and: ‘Is it really too much to expect hot soup to be served during the week?’