Richard’s white knuckle banter

LAST weekend traditionally signals the end of the Proper Summer with a weekend of boozing, or DIY or, if you are reckless, boozy DIY.

It’s also awash with female presenters, with Carolyn Quinn sitting in for Eddie Mair, Sara Cox covering for Chris Evans, and Laura Maxwell subbing for Kaye Adams.

The exception is ITV’s Good Morning Britain – because who could possibly replace a beachcombing Piers Morgan?

The answer: Richard Madeley, possibly because he’s the only other person on the planet capable of turning live TV into a daily white knuckle ride by saying whatever random thought pops into his head on air.

This is the man who interviewed Bill Clinton about his affair with Monica Lewinsky and tried to console the President by saying: ‘I know what it’s like to be wronged by the Press. I was once accused of shoplifting. Unlike you though, I knew I was innocent.’

In his current actionpacked stint on early morning telly, Richard has hectored a Cycling UK spokesman for questiondodging, and became very excited by a report on quicksand. ‘It almost got me once when I was a kid – more about that later,’ he promised, then offered the insight : ‘It’s a horrible way to die.’

I can’t believe Judy Finnegan is happy to retire from this kind of onscreen banter to become an author. However, if she does get round to writing a novel about a woman married to a loud but loving, fast-talking but utterly infuriating husband, I’d certainly buy it. I bet the research would be impeccable.