NO KEEPING A £420m STRIKE FORCE AT BAY
CERTAIN tasks still push the limits of human capabilities. To date, no one has worked out how to rake water up a hill. Experts on how to herd cats remain thin on the ground. Perhaps shortly they will add the job of keeping a £420million strike force at bay to the list of the nigh-impossible. The existence in one team of Neymar, Kylian Mbappe and Edinson Cavani is almost beyond cruel. It ought to be something from the fertile imagination of a teenage gamer but, as Brendan Rodgers found to his cost last night, it’s all too real. One year ago in the Nou Camp, Celtic faced a Barcelona side who were very much in the mood and the result — a 7-0 thumping — was painful. The lesson of the night was supposedly the folly in standing off good players and letting them cast their spells. Yet last night’s first half, in particular, was like a re-run of an old horror film. At times, it was hard to fathom if Celtic were again being too passive or if PSG were simply so assured and magnificent that the Scots were always going to be chasing shadows. Whatever the truth of the matter, the gulf in class was enormous. Three goals down at the break, Rodgers’ side belatedly let the Qatari Works XI know they were on the same field as them. By the end, normal service had been resumed — the concession of two further late goals making it Celtic’s worst-ever home defeat in Europe. Never has the old wisdom about getting exactly what you pay for seemed more apt. Legend has it that the sound made by the Krakatoa volcanic eruption in 1883 was so loud it ruptured eardrums of people 40 miles away. Shortly before 7.45pm last night, the noise emanating from the east end of Glasgow threatened to do similar damage to those present. Down the decades, the old place has truly been shaken to the core shortly before battle was done with some of the game’s most illustrious names. Perhaps it was the fact this reprise of the group stage had been 10 months in the making. Unquestionably, the superstars in our midst had much to do with it. But this felt even more special than normal. Just a decibel or two higher on the scale, for sure. What a pity it was silenced so quickly. At 18, Anthony Ralston might well have spent the evening down at Dumbarton facing PSG’s stars of tomorrow in the UEFA Youth League. Instead, his task for the night was to nullify the world’s most expensive player — Neymar da Silva Santos Junior, to give him his Sunday name. At the other end of the field stood a player intent on making up for lost time at this level. Injury and indifferent form largely put paid to Leigh Griffiths’ hopes of making his mark on this stage last year. With Moussa Dembele on the brink of returning, there would be no time like the present to make an impact. Alas, neither were to enjoy the evening they must have dreamed of. Ralston’s first imprint on the game — and Neymar’s calf — came within three minutes. It would take more than bumps and bruises to knock the Brazilian and his team-mates out of their stride, though. PSG’s start to the contest was startling. They found angles that didn’t seem possible. Flicks and tricks. Total mastery of the football. Cavani had one chalked off for offside then had a stinging strike saved before Neymar broke the deadlock. Sure, Griffiths had a free-kick tipped over but resistance almost seemed futile. All hope of a miraculous comeback ended when Mbappe lashed home 11 minutes from the break, followed by Jozo Simunovic’s needless barge on Thiago Motta. Cavani converted from the spot. Mikael Lustig’s own goal and Cavani’s header for the fifth were harsh but this was not a night for complaints. The only consolation for Celtic is that they will not be the last side to suffer in such a fashion this season.