Screeech! Time to hit the brakes and admit it’s been a bumpy ride, Nicola

STOP talking down Scotland’ goes the perennial cry of the Scottish Nationalist, which roughly translates as ‘Stop pointing out unpalatable facts about Scottish Nationalism’.

It’s not enough that the SNP governs every aspect of our lives, from how much tax we pay to where tobacconists can display their shameful contraband – it expects us to be grateful for it.

Those of us who critique the Scottish Government are happy to give credit where it is due. The Nationalists replaced a Lib-Lab Scottish Executive that was well-intentioned but by the end stale and listless. They brought new ideas and fresh talent and, until they got sidetracked by independence, tried to keep the ship of state cruising ahead.

And, yes, the Queensferry Crossing is a laudable structure. Ten million man hours, 150,000 tons of concrete and 23,000 miles of cabling – the 1.7-mile bridge is a redoubtable feat of engineering. The designers and workers, who hail from as far afield as the US and Australia, are justly proud of their achievement.

Dazzling

The Scottish Government deserves a pat on the back for pursuing this £1.35billion project, though Lord knows it has done enough self-congratulation already – not least Nicola Sturgeon, who unveiled the new crossing in August with a dazzling light show and a vehicle parade, as if she’d been putting in nights pouring the concrete herself.

So you might expect Miss Sturgeon’s government, after taking all the credit for the crossing, to accept at least some of the blame now a ‘snag’ has been hit – yet ministers refuse even to acknowledge that there is a problem.

The bridge was closed to southbound traffic on Thursday night, three months after opening, for what the First Minister called ‘snagging’ work. Southbound drivers will be diverted via the Forth Road Bridge until Wednesday morning while 15 yards of tarmac are replaced.

A temporary speed limit of 40mph has been slapped on both crossings. Transport Scotland admits it knew about the faults before the bridge opened and warns motorists of further travel restriceven tions over the next ten months. Yet despite this, the First Minister cannot even bring herself to admit the crossing is partially closed.

Last week at Holyrood, Scottish Tory leader Ruth Davidson tried to pin down the First Minister on the matter, only to be told: ‘The bridge will not be closed during those five days; instead, southbound traffic will use the existing Forth Road Bridge.’

The look that spread across Miss Davidson’s face – half bafflement, half wonder – will stay with me for some time. By contrast, Miss Sturgeon can hold a line, no matter how ridiculous, with the stony face of a Las Vegas poker player.

Austrian physicist Erwin Schrödinger once posed a thought experiment about a cat sealed inside a box with poison – as its fate could not be known until the container was opened, it was in theory both dead and alive at the same time. The First Minister has one-upped Schrödinger’s Cat with Sturgeon’s Bridge – both open and closed but, no matter what, not the SNP’s fault.

The First Minister could have been upfront about the repairs but she wanted some good headlines. For a woman who, like Oscar Wilde, never interrupts a flatterer, good publicity was always going to come first.

Motorists who rely on the Queensferry Crossing for commuting, and business owners who use it to transport goods and workers, will have been as galled as Miss Davidson by the First Minister’s performance. Sometimes it’s not the crime or the cover-up that damns you, it’s the self-serving plea in mitigation. Over the weekend, one of Miss Sturgeon’s spin doctors sneered on Twitter that the Tories were ‘working themselves up into a state of outrage about some roadworks’. It was a telling remark for a party increasingly out of touch with the lives and concerns of ordinary people. Ministers chauffeured from one photoop to another in taxpayer-funded cars could hardly be expected to grasp the inconvenience caused by up to ten months of diversions, delays and reduced speed limits. Politicians who work three days a week at the parliament and rarely knock off after 5pm probably wouldn’t understand the rigmarole involved in late-night travel when you work shifts or need to move goods late at night.

There are some hard-working members of the Scottish parliament but, on the whole, the working patterns of a career in politics are very different from those of running a small business or staffing hospitals as a junior doctor.

Disruptions

For the entrepreneur, the prospect of a major crossing being closed for up to ten months, even if only partially, is alarming. At best, it will mean disruptions. At worst, it could mean late deliveries, missed meetings and, as a consequence, even lost contracts. For the junior doctor and others on the frontline of public services, it means already dangerously long shifts become longer still.

Ministers would understand these realities if they lived them, or at least spent some time talking to those who do. Yet the Scottish Government seems uninterested in hearing from anyone outside its bubble of advisers, flunkies and thirdsector head-nodders and remains blithely incurious about the views of those who put in the hours, create jobs and keep the economy and public services running.

If the SNP wants gold stars for projects such as the Queensferry Crossing, it also has to take the rap over the knuckles. Good government isn’t about sitting around waiting for praise, it’s about turning political capital into lasting achievements.

The praise will come and, if the wretched ingrates fail to appreciate your greatness, you can use your memoirs to tell the world they were just talking down Scotland.