It’s Anna, 48, in BOTH pictures — before and after hair extensions
days my hair barely meets the standards of a rough-coated terrier, is an unexpected joy.
In recent years, it’s lost gloss, volume, shine — and gained only frizzle. Whenever I visit my stylist, I request a ‘blunt, choppy’ cut. But I never get that because I don’t have enough hair. It’s thick enough on the crown, but by the time it reaches shoulder length, it’s wispy and thin. It’s tough on my self-esteem.
But now I feel my mood soar and I wonder why our hair, and the state of it, exerts such a powerful influence on us.
Psychotherapist Wendy Bristow says: ‘Our identity and our confidence is tied to a greater or lesser extent, to our appearance. It’s a rare person who has 100 per cent self-esteem and doesn’t care what they look like at all.’
While Bristow notes that ‘all change is stressful, as it involves adjustment’, changes to our hair have deep significance.
‘We live in a cultural climate that is increasingly narcissistic — mothers Instagramming pictures of themselves looking exactly like their daughters is a case in point. The whole selfie culture is all about what we look like, not what we feel like inside. And this can be devastating if we feel we’re ‘losing’ our looks.
‘Women in their 40s and 50s are no longer having a perm and a weekly shampoo and set like their mothers might have done. The upside is your hairstyle no longer dates you in the way it once did.
‘The downside is (along with the pressure to look 30 for ever) that women can feel devastated if their hair doesn’t look youthful.
‘Ageing is a process of loss, and tied up with signs of ageing such as hair thinning is the unconscious thought “oh my gosh, look where this is going”.’
And our subconscious is, unfortunately, on the right track. Trichologist Iain Sallis says: ‘The ability of your cells to reproduce slows down as you age. So the hair will become slightly thinner and weaker. You’re genetically designed to start failing as you get older.’
If our nutrition isn’t at optimum level, our hair suffers further.
Sallis says: ‘If you are low in iron, or protein, vitamin D, or B12, that slows the process down even more. Protein is really important for hair growth, as a hair is a protein strand.’
HOrmOnAl changes that occur in our 40s and 50s also make a difference. ‘When oestrogen starts diminishing in a female’s body, it slows the hair down quite considerably. The hair loves oestrogen,’ says Sallis. ‘So after the menopause is when women can start manifesting genetic hair thinning.’
I now understand why my luscious new hair, this signifier of good health and vitality, is quite so pleasing. The sense of satisfaction is similar to how I feel after I’ve had my hair coloured — younger in spirit as well as in body.
When I meet a friend in her late 40s (long, shiny, beautifully-coiffed hair, lies about her age and everyone believes her) she welcomes me to the club.
‘nothing beats the feeling of having a good weight of hair!’ she cries.
She’s right, and for the boost to mood alone, it’s worth it.
Carol Knight Balch, 52, from Cheam, South-West london, who runs an office refurbishment business with her husband Paul, 48, is evangelical about her extensions, claiming they are more effective than Botox, which she admits to trying in the past. ‘I can honestly say hair extensions are better at turning back the clock. not only do they last longer and look more natural, they work out cheaper too,’ she says.
‘When I dress up to go out, they are my secret ingredient. I’ve had plenty of comments about looking younger — all down to my luscious locks,’ enthuses the 52-year-old, who spends £165 each time for natural lengths extensions that last a few months.
‘I started having extensions about a year ago when my hair became thinner. I came home with long, dark hair and my husband was unimpressed. He couldn’t understand why I wanted to look like that. The next time, they were shorter and more subtle. So much so he didn’t notice, but I felt much more attractive.’
lara Bishop, 41, mother of eightyear-old twin girls from Guildford, Surrey, says it was her husband, nick, 47, a company director, who encouraged her to consider hair extensions. ‘my hair has always been fine, but it wasn’t until my mid 30s that it started to bother me,’ says lara, who went to Tantrum Hair Extensions ‘I suffer from two chronic balance disorders, one of which causes crippling migraines and seems to age me prematurely.
‘my skin became grey and lined. He knew how hard the past few years had been so nick encouraged me to go for it and loved the result. I must say it lifted my mood. my hairdresser uses the highest quality human hair which lies flat so it looks smooth.
‘It is attached with copper micro-rings, which can be moved up my hair as it grows. It costs me £280 for a full head, which lasts nine months, and then £150 every nine weeks, where they take them out and re-attach further up your hair. I find it less expensive than having a cut and colour for £120 every five weeks. now, however terrible I feel, at least my hair looks great.’ For older women experiencing thinning hair or hair loss, extensions can be a huge boost and there are salons springing up which specialise in extensions for those with finer hair. ‘The moment I heard a specialist salon was launching nearby I put my name down on the waiting list,’ says Beverley Wareing, 65, who lives with her husband Peter, 69, in Solihull and works at Birmingham’s nEC. ‘I went with a colleague, and we felt like excited, giggling teenagers. I started off with 60 extensions designed for finer hair. They are connected using polymer rubber bonds (a sort of special glue). I look after them carefully — avoiding oily products which can compromise the glue. ‘Every 12 weeks I go back to lucinda Ellery’s salon (lucinda ellery-hairloss.co.uk) to check they’re all in place and whether they need replacing — it costs from £150.
‘As soon as they were in, I both looked and felt five years younger. my husband likes them: he’s happy if I’m happy.
‘Five years ago I’d catch sight of myself in a mirror and flinch at the old woman staring back at me. now I’ve got my confidence and a bit of my youth back. And every day is a good hair day!’
MEAnWHIlE, at lulu Blonde, my transformation is surprisingly painless thanks to extension specialist Stacie Odwell.
She creates an 11-inch track on my scalp, by clamping tiny fasteners to evenly-spaced sections of my hair. Then a thread is woven through the fasteners, onto which hair pieces are sewn.
Her unique method, natural.X puts less stress on the follicles, and unlike some extensions there’s no glue, which Stacie likens to ‘putting chewing gum in your hair’. And it’s so quick. It takes 50 minutes, and pulls a little. That’s it.
‘Because your hair is quite fine and there’s a bit of breakage, which is quite typical at your age, I want to give you more weight,’ says Stacie.
‘Chic and classy extensions to keep it in the best condition. We’re giving you more thickness rather than hair down to your bottom. With any extensions, the more you add, the more damage you create.’
Afterwards, everyone crowds around to admire my new fabulous tresses — in gaining thick tumbling hair with that beautiful bounce and curl, I feel I’ve lost a decade.
When I make my grand entrance at home, my 15-year old son is the most appreciative: ‘It looks great,’ he says. ‘It looks thick — have you had a hair transplant?’
my husband thinks it looks ‘gorgeous’ and insists that we go out for dinner.
‘You look high maintenance,’ he explains. ‘You can’t waste this!’
There’s some tightness afterwards — when I eat, every chew pulls on my scalp. And the first night, any contact with the pillow is uncomfortable. But I managed to sleep eventually.
There’s never a point at which I feel desperate to tear the wefts out of my hair, as I have done with previous extensions. And the tension fades within 48 hours.
The wefts are worn for a maximum of seven weeks, after which — because your hair grows — they end up a good inch away from your scalp and must be re-attached (at a cost of £300). But the same extensions can be re-used for up to a year.
If you’d like your hair to be super-duper lengthened and thickened — the full Cheryl Tweedy — it costs £1,000.
Super-thickening and lengthening costs from £650, basic thickening from £440. And if my hair needs colouring, Stacie can snip out the wefts in five minutes, then dye and re-attach them.
Stacie, 38, says she first became fascinated with hair as a teenager when a stressful event caused a relative’s hair to temporarily thin in her 30s. That lament we can all relate to — ‘my hair, my hair!’ — stuck with her.
I’ve also had my hair lamenting moments, and the boost that a full fabulous, thick, youthful coiffure gives to my self-esteem feels profound.