Ephraim Hardcastle
AT Monday’s Commonwealth Day service, the Queen adroitly solved the problem of who would escort her into Westminster Abbey now that Prince Philip has retired. Prince Charles was the obvious choice but that would have effectively demoted Camilla (not good for Project Queen Camilla). if Prince Andrew took Philip’s place it would elevate him above Charles in the processions and seating plan. so the Queen chose the Dean of Westminster, Dr John hall, who broke with precedent and walked beside her. No one wanted a repeat of the 2012 Diamond Jubilee service at st Paul’s when, with Philip in hospital, the Queen walked unaccompanied down the aisle. VISITING Broadcasting House for an interview with Victoria Derbyshire, Noel Edmonds, 69, says: ‘I’m in a building which I respect and appreciate... I thank the BBC for 30 fantastic years of wonderful opportunity.’ A change of tune from his bizarre 2014 bid to buy the Corporation, with a mysterious consortium. Jeremy Paxman asked: ‘Who are they? Lots of blokes with beards who present afternoon television programmes?’ Could oddball Edmonds have done much worse than the current sorry bunch running the BBC? A hARRY and Meghan Royal Wedding colouring book has them, pictured, reprising the Kate WinsletLeonardo DiCaprio romantic embrace on the prow of the Titanic with harry bragging: ‘i’m sixth in line to be king of the world.’ Bad taste? Not as execrable as another scene in the book where harry recreates Jack Nicholson’s demented role in the horror movie The shining, declaring: ‘heeeere’s harry’ POLLY Findlay, 35, director of the new RSC Macbeth with Christopher Eccleston, is married to Marc Tritschler, musical director of the National Theatre’s rival Macbeth with Rory Kinnear. ‘Its hilarious,’ says Polly. ‘We come home and say, “How was your Macbeth today? Fine thanks, how was your Macbeth?”’ Methinks less hilarious for Marc. Our theatre critic, Quentin Letts, described his Macbeth as a ‘stinker’, adding sweetly: ‘It is a low-lit mess engulfed by blunt grottiness.’ EVERGREEN Dame Joan Collins, 84, urges fans to attend a talk by her son, sacha Newley, at Oxford Literary Festival about his book, Unaccompanied Minor. Joanie was decidedly less keen when sacha, 52, claimed his late father, Anthony Newley, had been a ‘paedophile’. A furious Joan thundered: ‘Never in a million years would i have been married to somebody like that.’ FORMER Liverpool player Jamie Carragher, suspended as a Sky Sports pundit after a spitting incident, won’t be chuckling at the late Ken Dodd’s quip: ‘I was going to play for Liverpool once but I couldn’t spit far enough.’