No laughing matter when Scots are the warm-up act

NOBODY knows the name of Bob Perlow, the nearly man of American television. For 30 years, the former academic worked on some of television’s best-loved sitcoms. Mork and Mindy, Taxi, Cheers, Growing Pains, Friends. He had a credit on thousands of the world’s best-loved comedy shows. But Bob Perlow’s name was never up in lights with Robin Williams or Danny DeVito or Ted Danson or Matt Le Blanc. He was the warm-up guy. The comic turn nobody knew handed the job of revving up a studio audience who weren’t there to see him. And Scotland’s national football team have come to know how this feels. When football’s stadium rockers need a support act before a World Cup or a European Championships, there’s always one team ready and available at a discounted rate. Their fans might know the name. They almost certainly won’t know the players. Despite it all, Scotland are the go-to team for the Costa Ricas and Perus of this world. The perfect stunt double for Serbia or Switzerland. Reports suggest 700,000 Peru fans have applied for tickets for their final World Cup warm-up against Alex McLeish’s team in Lima on June 2. Poised to participate in their first World Cup for 36 years after 12 games unbeaten, Peruvians are going nuts for their national team. Contrast that with Scotland. A country where the indifference and hostility towards the international side grows with every failed qualification campaign. Nations League qualifiers begin in September, offering a pathway to the Euro 2020 finals and a level of redemption. Glasgow will host some of the games and Alex McLeish hopes Tuesday’s win over Hungary can empower his team. If he’s wrong, another two years on the warm-up circuit beckon. Telling a few gags before shuffling off the stage when the big names roll up. Like Bob Perlow.