I was worried she’d be disappointed in me . . . but we both just burst into tears
SUE BENNETT, 44, lives in Stafford with husband Anthony, 46, an accounts manager. They have three children: Millie, 15, Billy, 12, and Jack, 11. Sue received a liver transplant in June 2011, thanks to Sharron Jones’s only daughter Amy, 24. Sharron, 49, works for an optical distribution company and lives in Wrexham with her partner Wayne Hughes, 50, a pipe layer.
SUE SAYS: In the two weeks before my transplant I had accepted that I was dying. I’d written goodbye letters to my children and even bought my daughter Millie, who was then 13, a present to open on her wedding day because I didn’t think I would be here.
I had cirrhosis of the liver diagnosed when I was 37 — there was no reason for it; doctors just told me I was incredibly unlucky. In the month before the transplant I went downhill quickly — even walking a few steps took real effort.
Doctors told me that without a transplant I would die. When I got the call seven years ago to say a donor had been found, I was already in hospital in London for specialist blood cleansing treatment.
It was an incredible moment. But it was awful too, because the nurses told me the donor was a young girl with brain damage and we had to wait for her to pass away. There are no words to describe how traumatic that was, knowing that in another hospital somewhere, another mother was losing her daughter.
I don’t remember the first two days after the operation. But on the third day I remember realising that the dreadful itch all over my body, caused by my liver failing, had gone. It was unbelievable. I felt alive again.
Three months later, I wrote to Sharron, anonymously at first, through the hospital. I had an overwhelming feeling of guilt. I really wanted to thank her, but also to tell her how sorry I was. She wrote back with pages and pages telling me what Amy was like, with photographs.
We wrote each other another letter after that, and we knew each other’s real names from the start.
I told her how Amy had transformed my life, and how my children still had their mum. I wanted Sharron to know the ripple effect of what she’d done.
We first met in the summer of 2016. I’d just done the British Transplant Games — an athletics event for people who have had a transplant. I’d won a gold medal in the 1,500 metres and I wanted to give it to Sharron, for Amy.
We met at a golf resort where Amy had worked. We were both instantly in floods of tears, it was so overwhelming to meet Sharron in person. I knew I hadn’t caused her daughter to die but I still felt responsible. I had been worried about how the meeting would go, that I would disappoint her, that she would hate the fact that I was here and her daughter wasn’t. The first thing I said to her was: ‘Can you forgive me?’
She said there was nothing to forgive — and that Amy was doing her proud by helping me. We spoke for three hours, then went to Amy’s grave.
Sharron and I have remained firm friends ever since. We message each other once a week and meet up every few months.
When Sharron posts messages on Facebook, sharing a memory about Amy, I know she is struggling and I message her and tell her I’m keeping Amy safe for her.
SHARRON SAYS: Knowing that part of Amy is being looked after by Sue does give me great comfort. Amy had epilepsy and died after she had a seizure at home aged 24. She was taken to hospital but it was too late.
We had all discussed organ donation as a family anyway — my sister-in-law, Julie, had died two years earlier aged 44, while waiting for a lung transplant. When the hospital asked me, I had no hesitation.
I was so nervous about meeting Sue for the first time, but when I saw her walking towards me, this wave of peace washed over me.
Sue and I will be friends for the rest of our lives — I’ve met her three children, which was lovely. Millie thinks of Amy as a sister, as she is part of Sue. I’m so grateful to have Sue in my life, and she is doing Amy proud.