THE DAMNING EMAIL IN FULL

This week, Jeff Bezos leaked an email sent from the National Enquirer to his lawyer, which seems to suggest that if the Amazon boss doesn’t quash a Washington Post story, then highly embarrassing, sexual pictures of Bezos could be published in the magazine.

Marty:

In the interests of expediating [sic] this situation, and with The Washington Post poised to publish unsubstantiated rumours of The National Enquirer’s initial report, I wanted to describe to you the photos obtained during our newsgathering. In addition to the below the belt selfie, The Enquirer obtained a further nine images. These include: ÷ Mr. Bezos face selfie at what appears to be a business meeting.

÷ Ms. Sanchez response — a photograph of her smoking a cigar in what appears to be a simulated oral sex scene.

÷ A shirtless Mr. Bezos holding his phone in his left hand — while wearing his wedding ring. He’s wearing either tight black cargo pants or shorts — and his semi-erect manhood is penetrating the zipper of said garment.

÷ A full-length body selfie of Mr. Bezos wearing just a pair of tight black boxer-briefs or trunks, with his phone in his left hand — while wearing his wedding ring.

÷ A selfie of Mr. Bezos fully clothed.

÷ A full-length scantily-clad body shot.

÷ A naked selfie in a bathroom — while wearing his wedding ring. Mr. Bezos is wearing nothing but a white towel — and the top of his pubic region can be seen.

÷ Ms. Sanchez wearing a plunging red neckline dress revealing her cleavage and a glimpse of her nether region.

÷ Ms. Sanchez wearing a two-piece red bikini with gold detail dress revealing her cleavage.

It would give no editor pleasure to send this email. I hope common sense can prevail — and quickly.