Blind date

Every week, we send a couple out on a blind date. This time Paul Possee, 46, had lunch at Old Compton Brasserie, in London’s Soho with Katherine Blackler, 39. Katherine is a professional declutterer and lives in South London. Paul is a logistics manager from Faversham, Kent.

KATHERINE, 39, SAYS:

I WAS determined to arrive on time, and in the end was just ten minutes late. That’s a personal best for me — which probably explains why I’m still single and have a time management coach. I’m always overambitious about packing things in to my life!

The first thing I noticed about Paul was his beard. I’m so glad I didn’t let that put me off, because from the moment I sat down with him I found it so easy to be ‘me’.

I could see we’d get on. He’s very selfdeprecating and I am, too.

We were so busy chatting that our waiter had to come back on several occasions before he could take our order. I’m teetotal, but told Paul I have no problem with him ordering alcohol. He’s not a big drinker so ordered a pale ale while I had kombucha, a fermented tea drink.

I stopped drinking in January 2016 and while I’m still just as sociable without it, I like to think I’m a lot pickier when it comes to guys. I haven’t always chosen well.

But I felt so comfortable around Paul I was able to tell him lots of personal things — such as how I’ve invested in a time management coach to help get my life on track.

My coach has helped me put together a list of things I want to find time for, and a date was one of them. I’m not sure I would have found diary space for a blind date if I hadn’t committed to directing my energies towards my love life.

In my 20s I had two long relationships. One was with a university friend, which fizzled out when I realised our grandparents were probably having more sex than we were. I then fell for an Alpha Male — and while there was chemistry, I let myself be moulded into someone I wasn’t. The whole experience put me off relationships for a while.

I really can’t believe it’s the first proper date Paul has ever been on, despite having several relationships. It’s a brave thing to do. I’ve been on too many to mention.

One chap I’d gone for drinks with told me after five minutes not to bother ordering a round as we weren’t going anywhere. But the most memorable was with someone I’d met online. He asked if my dad was bald. He’d studied genetics and the baldness gene passed down the father’s line.

I was dumbfounded. I was at the ‘are we going to have a dessert?’ stage and he was trying to determine if our kids would have receding hair.

That’s why I’ve been mainly single for a decade, with not so much as a snog for two-and-a-half years. But I’ve also been focused on my business.

Paul ticks a lot of boxes, and I liked that he didn’t ask me too much about my work, which provokes a lot of curiosity that can dominate the conversation. But he seemed more interested in Katherine the woman, rather than Katherine the declutterer. It was quite lovely being asked about me for once.

Paul is funny and we have a similar sense of humour. He laughed as I talked about trying to sort out my life with a coach.

We texted after the date and have arranged to see each other again before I go on holiday in a couple of weeks. Paul was fabulous company. He could be a good influence on me. LIKED: I felt so relaxed around Paul and had a fun two hours.

REGRETS: I had to rush off. I’d have loved to spend the afternoon together. COFFEE OR CAB? Coffee.

VERDICT: 8/10 PAUL, 46, SAYS:

ON THE day I was nervous and then some, because I’ve never been on a date before. In 2019, everyone finds this very hard to believe, but it’s true. I’ve had three big relationships but I met each woman at work.

So I made sure I was waiting at the restaurant for our lunch date. When Katherine arrived I was pleased, because she’s a very attractive and nicely dressed woman. She started chatting immediately and didn’t stop.

This was a relief, because I’m often the one who leads the conversation when I’m out with friends.

We really clicked and were laughing and joking within minutes. It meant we had to send the waiter away on a few occasions. When we did get round to ordering a drink, even though Katherine is teetotal it didn’t bother her that I had one drink. Our conversation covered everything: our working lives, reasons for being single. Katherine also talked about her hobbies. She has a variety of interests, from being in a choir to using flotation tanks to yoga.

I’m passionate about classic cars, and I loved that she had so much going on outside work, too. I thought we were very well matched — although I have to confess it helped that Katherine is totally my type of woman.

I came out of a long-term relationship a year ago. My sister, who is also single, warned me about dating apps and websites. She’s right because they’ve been disastrous, and there was a part of me that wondered if I’d missed the boat as I’m too old for them.

All of my friends except one are in relationships they’ve been in since our teens. When we all go out together, while I’m made very welcome, I can feel like the third wheel. When out socially I can be very shy around women, but I’m in the office 45 hours a week so there isn’t much opportunity to meet someone anywhere else.

So my friend’s wife put me forward for this. I genuinely thought it was a joke at first.

But I’m so glad I agreed. The end of the date arrived in what seemed like minutes rather than two-and-a-half hours.

Katherine had to go to a prior engagement, so we swapped numbers and, within moments of leaving, she had texted. I was really pleased when she asked: ‘Can I see you again?’

Katherine is smart, funny, petite and pretty — and yes, I did worry that she’s out of my league.

I met a friend in the pub afterwards for a de-brief, and it turned into a celebration drink.

My first proper date honestly couldn’t have gone better.

LIKED? We laughed and joked straight away. We were very well matched. REGRETS? None. COFFEE OR CAB? Coffee.

VERDICT: 10/10

Honestly, the first thing I noticed was his beard... I did worry that she’s out of my league