SIX OF BOB’S GREATEST HITS

1

‘There it is . . . And there it goes. Put the cheese in the trap, in walks the mouse and off goes his head.’

Darren Gough, out for a duck, proves no match for the wiles of Shane Warne in the first Ashes Test at Edgbaston in July 2001.

2

‘There should be three sets of stocks in the town square in Leeds: one for Andy Flower, one for Alastair Cook and one for Jonathan Trott. And a great big barrel of rotten tomatoes to hurl at them.’

Bob finds England’s negative tactics hard to take in their laborious victory over New Zealand in the second Test at Headingley in May 2013.

3

‘I have never had a Jagerbomb. Maybe Australian beer is even worse than it used to be.’

Bob gives a damning assessment of David Warner’s reported choice of drink before the altercation with Joe Root in the lead-up to the 2013 Ashes.

4

‘Would I have liked to play Twenty20? Not half, only four overs a day? Wouldn’t mind getting smashed around for the sort of money these guys are earning these days.’

Bob reveals some of his feelings about Twenty20 cricket.

5

‘Well, he isn’t an international wicketkeeper, is he, let’s be honest about it. You know, I called him a stopper standing back. I mean, standing up he looks like a performing seal at feeding time... flapping away there!’

Jonny Bairstow’s performance in the first Test at Durban in December 2015 fails to win Bob’s approval.

6

‘The last idiot to put Australia in at Adelaide in an Ashes Test was yours truly, RGD Willis. I thought Joe Root might have learned from that mistake, but apparently not.’

Reflecting on the lessons of history after Joe Root’s ill-fated decision to bowl first in the Adelaide Test during the 2017–18 Ashes.