I was back at work three hours after giving birth

Carrie Johnson won’t be taking maternity leave — and she’s just one of a growing number of women for whom a baby is a mere blip in their busy schedules

Then Screwed. The cost of living is another huge factor when it comes to women returning to work. According to the Child Poverty Action Group charity, raising a child to the age of 18 costs a typical couple £151,000 — that’s around £700 a month — and few families can afford that with only one parent working.

Emma Cusden, 33, knew it was a financial risk to start her own healthcare marketing company in January 2020, when she was already three months pregnant with her second child. The pandemic threw her plans into chaos.

‘I already knew I’d have to return to work relatively quickly because I’d taken on new clients and I couldn’t suddenly take three months off,’ says Emma, who lives in West Sussex with her husband Johnny, 35, a firefighter, and their children Freddy, five, and Sailor, one.

‘But lockdown hit my business hard. I managed to diversify into other healthcare sectors, but it was worrying for a while. I felt in a permanent state of fight-or-flight, which isn’t healthy when you’re five months pregnant.

‘One of the reasons I booked an elective C-section was so I could feel a little more in control.

‘The NHS was brilliant about it. I booked the operation for

July 21, 2020 and was able to send emails right up until I was wheeled into hospital. Then I hoped to relax for two weeks with my baby.’

In fact, Emma did no such thing. ‘I had Sailor at 11am, and at 2pm I was responding to emails,’ she says.

‘One nurse said: “Aren’t you supposed to be on maternity leave?” but when you have your own business, it’s not a luxury you can take. I wasn’t about to back off and lose clients.

‘I had a ten-week battle with mastitis and ended up in hospital on an IV drip. But even then, I was working from my bed when Johnny took Sailor out with him to give me a break.

‘I remember the midwife saying I needed to slow down and use the two hours for myself to heal. I look back now and think that maybe if we hadn’t been in a pandemic, I’d have been more relaxed.’

Emma regrets missing out on the ‘baby bubble’ she enjoyed for the first couple of weeks with her elder child, Freddy — but, like Charlotte, she feels work is a strong part of her identity.

‘I feel very rewarded being a working mum,’ she says. ‘My mother was the breadwinner and I look back and realise it must have been really hard for her to miss out on moments in my childhood, such as piano recitals.

‘But I can do both because I work for myself and can juggle appointments. What’s more, we can afford nice holidays and treats for the children. It’s good for them to see that I earn as much as, if not more than, my husband.

‘I’ve had comments from other mums such as: “Don’t you feel like you’re not spending as much time with your family?” I have one friend who gave up her career for her baby, but that meant she also had to give up her car and go everywhere by public transport. I’d really miss my independence.

‘Freddy will sometimes say to me: “You’re always working!” and we’ve explained that one of us can stop working but that would mean no £100 trips to the zoo or sports such as rugby and horse-riding.’

The couple have now hired a fulltime nanny. ‘Our nanny Sarah has a degree in childhood psychology and being a ‘mother’ comes naturally to her. She gives Sailor that one-on-one time and takes her to the library or petting zoo. Am I jealous? Only in the sense that I’m jealous of anyone’s natural ability to mother a young child.

‘I’m not like that. I love my children but I couldn’t do it full-time like some women. I was breastfeeding up until six weeks ago, but I’m happy being back at work.’

While some might understand the need to return to work quickly if you have your own business, what about those mothers who could have paid maternity leave?

Angie Willingham, 38, works for an anti-money laundering company. She could have taken many months of leave (although not on full pay) but decided to return just four weeks after giving birth to her son, Carter, in May. Meanwhile, her husband Kris, 38, has taken 50 weeks off from his job with the council to be a full-time father.

‘I couldn’t wait to get back to work,’ says Angie. ‘I love my son but when I wasn’t working, I felt a part of me was missing. When I got pregnant, Kris and I had a big discussion about money and how and where we would live. I’ve reached senior leadership level and I have always wanted to be at director level by the time I’m 40. I still have that goal.’

Angie, who lives in Hertfordshire, worked right up to two days before her C-section in May.

‘I was the first woman in our company to have a baby,’ she says. ‘I was still on probation so in theory I wasn’t able to benefit from the 90 per cent salary [to qualify for this statutory maternity pay for six weeks, you must have worked for an employer for at least 26 weeks]. But I asked for it and they paid me for four weeks.

‘I told myself I’d take four weeks off and organised everything from food to a masseuse in that time,’ she says. ‘But even then, I missed work and was only 95 per cent switched off because I’d check in regularly with a senior member of the team and look at emails.

‘I have no regrets. Carter deserves so much attention but mentally I know I can’t do it.

‘Thankfully, his dad is a wonderful, natural father who is happy to take him to things such as baby sensory classes. But I can’t be a full-time mother — I’d go crazy.’

‘I love my children but I couldn’t do it full-time like some women