The Royal Family are a fairy tale pantomime in a modern world
ROYALS. them.
Like all celebrities, they’re great copy for journalists, and the pictures are pretty.
Anything with Prince Harry just got prettier because he now has Meghan Markle by his side.
And she was, I suspect, the reason that hundreds came out on a chilly January day to see the Prince when he visited Cardiff last Thursday.
Alone, he would not have been so appealing. Harry’s cute and ginger and everything, but alone he is a bit dull.
And he has done some silly things, like turn up at a fancy dress party dressed as a Nazi officer in 2005.
After a photo of Harry sporting the unfortunate costume was published in newspapers the prince, who reportedly wore the outfit to a “colonial and native” costume party, said he was “very sorry if I caused any offence or embarrassment to anyone”.
He was 20 at the time and, while we’ve all of us done stupid things in our youth, dressing up as a Nazi, thankfully, isn’t the general rite of passage in most circles.
A few years later a video emerged of Harry, by now a soldier, calling one of his Pakistani platoon members “our little P*** friend”, a derogatory and demeaning remark that prompted a rebuke from David Cameron.
Afterwards the soldier concerned told a newspaper the prince had apologised to him and there were “no hard feelings”.
“We were close friends when we were training and I know he is not a racist,” said Ahmed Raza Khan, a captain in the Pakistan Army and one of 440 elite cadets from his country chosen to spend 10 months training alongside Harry at the Sandhurst military academy, between 2005 and 2006.
It is perhaps ironic after these episodes that Harry is now the right-on flag bearer dragging the monarchy into the 21st century by marrying his previously-married, mixed-race girlfriend who attended a Catholic school.
But we’re all allowed to change – even members of the House of Windsor, not generally known for the speed with which it catches up with modern, progressive thought.
It’s true that Meghan will be baptised I’ve got nothing against and confirmed into the Church of England, of which the Queen is the head, before her wedding at St George’s Chapel, Windsor Castle in May, but many of us mere mortals have done things like this to secure a good venue for the nuptials and appease the future in-laws.
Harry, like most people, appears to have grown up, and is thankfully showing a human side that doubtless isn’t easy growing up and having a career in those two institutions, the royal family and the Army.
Last year he revealed he sought counselling after he “shut down all his emotions” for almost two decades after losing his mother, Diana, Princess of Wales.
As his family’s raison d’être is to uphold tradition and project a stiff upper what should applauded.
While I hope he has buried the Nazi costume for good and is coming to terms with losing his mother, I trust Harry and his relatives at the palace(s) won’t change too much.
Members of the House of Windsor are sticklers for ancient ritual and tradition. That’s their allure.
They are a fairy tale pantomime in a modern world.
Even the traditionally late service of the London to Cardiff train which Harry and Meghan arrived on last lip, may, come he be week was a source of ironic mirth rather than rail rage and the usual carping about the extortionate price of tickets. Most people want to be happy, and good entertainment takes us away from the humdrum for a while. Royal watchers and royal haters alike share one thing in common. They are obsessed by the House of Windsor and will jabber non-stop on the subject given half a chance. They are the different sides of the same coin – with the Queen’s head on it of course. The world likes the Royals because they are a living soap opera. And like all good fairy tales, their story has dark bits, light bits, sex, murder, tragedy and scandal.
For murder you have to go back a few centuries, when chopping off heads of wives you no longer wanted was in fashion, but the rest of it is all there and recorded in the last few decades.
As with all good scripts there is light relief and the resolution of conflict.
Harry and William are the happyever-after following a few disturbing episodes (well it was an entire miniseries really) in which their parents starred.
For those calling for an end to the monarchy and shrieking about keeping all the cash for the people in a new Republic, all I can say is this: you won’t get such good entertainment value from corrupt bureaucrats, diplomats and politicians.
The court of commoners that would replace them would cost as much without the glamour, and you won’t get anything to look at. There’d be no commemorative tea towels and no butlers spilling the beans.
It’s a bit like that rubbish fed to us by holiday companies saying they won’t charge us for using credit cards any more so we’ll all be better off.
Wrong. The money will just be taken in some other, usually hidden charge.
And the great thing about Harry marrying American actress Meghan is that now there’ll be a genuine thespian in the series.
We need more noises now the Duke of Edinburgh has gone into retirement, so I hope Meghan’s not going to be given a walk-on part with no script and no ad-libs allowed.
The bride-to-be has even got an apparently estranged sister, Samantha Grant, who is set to release a book about her family secrets.
You couldn’t make it up. It’s a scriptwriter’s dream.
There’s a reason we Brits never toppled our Royals. We love a good soap and we love a good moan. Even those who pretend not to.
Stay tuned. Whether it’s because you love the Royals or want to mutter about freeloaders and sycophants – the House of Windsor is still good value for a yarn.