RUGBY STAR DIES AFTER BATTLING ‘INNER DEMONS’
PARENTS TELL OF HEARTBREAK AT LOSS OF TALENTED SON
THE parents of a talented young rugby player who took his own life have paid an emotional tribute to their beloved son.
Former Cardiff Blues age-grade prop Lewis Isaac – nicknamed “Ox” – died last week after a long battle with mental health issues.
His parents, Dave and Martine, have been inundated with messages of sympathy and condolence from the wider rugby family and their local community in Splott.
There have been heartfelt messages from his former coaches and team-mates at the Blues, while their home is filled with flowers and sympathy cards.
Among the players to get in touch have been Wales World Cup squad member Dillon Lewis, fellow international Jarrod Evans and Bristol fly-half Callum Sheedy, who all played with him.
Describing his beloved son, Dave said: “Lewis was very caring, unselfish in a lot of areas.
“He was just a gentle gentleman who gave a lot of love to everybody around.
“I think he touched a hell of a lot of people throughout the world.
“The messages and the support we have had, not just from within rugby and the Splott and Cardiff community, but then out in Macedonia where he did some charity work.
“They emailed us their condolences and people further afield have as well.
“He was always thinking about other people.
“There’s a girl who lives nearby who had never had a Valentine’s card in her life.
“When he was about 14, Lewis went round the shop, bought a box of chocolates and a Valentine’s card.
“He climbed over the back, like the Milk Tray man, and put it on her back door, so that she had that.
“He was that big-hearted boy, but he had inner demons and just lost his battle with them.”
Lewis’ mum, Martine, adds: “He was an absolute diamond. He was just a lovely, thoughtful, caring boy.
“There was nothing he wouldn’t do for people. He was so loving.
“He would always think of everyone else ahead of himself.”
Lewis had Asperger syndrome and his parents say that contributed to his mental health struggles over a number of years.
“We could probably go back to when he was little,” said Martine.
“He had issues with himself from a young age about why he was different. He was a quiet, serious kid.
“He struggled to make friends and had really low self-esteem.
“He was very, very intelligent. “When he was three, he was asking teachers down in Moorland’s nursery how a lightbulb worked.
“And he wanted to be a paleontologist when he was like three or four.
“He was good at maths. And yet he was dyslexic and really struggled with his reading and his writing.
“He would obsess about certain things and over-think things.
“He just couldn’t see his self-worth. “He used to say to us all the time, I am going to make you proud. But I kept telling him he couldn’t make us any prouder.”
Outlining Lewis’ struggles, Martine continued: “It was a constant battle every day. It was literally day by day keeping him here.
“Every day was a struggle, not knowing how to keep him alive.
“I only said to him the other week, you would never do anything like that would you and he goes, ‘No, mam, I wouldn’t do it to you.’
“I feared this would happen for years. “The way I describe it is I was grieving my son who was still alive.”
Lewis attended Moorland Primary School, Willows High School, St David’s College and the University of South Wales, where he was studying scientific natural history.
As for his rugby, his talent was obvious as he progressed, playing for St Albans, St Joseph’s, Cardiff Schools and Cardiff Blues U16s.
“The best thing Lewis ever did was start playing rugby,” said Martine.
“Outside of family, rugby was the big thing for him.
“That’s where he felt accepted. He fitted in. He could have banter with the boys and talk about rugby and everything.
“When he was on the pitch, he would do his job, he wouldn’t let anybody down, he wouldn’t take a step back. He just wouldn’t give up.”
And what about the nickname Ox? “That came from when we first took him over St Albans RFC,” explained Dave.
“His coach Gibbo said ‘grab the ball and run at me’ and Lewis ran at him and just bowled him over.
“Gibbo goes ‘Bloody hell, you are as strong as an ox’ and that nickname stuck with him.
“With all and sundry, he was always called the Ox.
“Martine and myself were Mama and Papa Ox.
“On the pitch, he was at his happiest and his most comfortable. He knew he could excel at that.
“Off the pitch, he just couldn’t deal with things.
“I would love him to be here now. I am
expecting him to walk down the stairs any minute.
“All I can take from what has happened is that he’s at peace now. That’s what is getting us through it.
“All the inner demons that he was battling for so long are gone.”
Dave was keen to thank everyone who has sent messages of sympathy, including the company he works for as a site manager, G Oakley & Son, whom he says have been hugely supportive.
“Our phones haven’t stopped,” he said. “The support from everyone has been incredible. People have been brilliant.
“We had a lovely message off Dillon Lewis out in Japan, saying that when he played with or against Lewis he was just a top bloke.
“That kind of thing really means a lot, so a big thank you to everyone who has taken the trouble to get in touch.”
Finally, Dave had his own message for fellow parents who might have concerns about their children.
“Parents out there, just watch your kids,” he said.
“Grab hold of them every night. “They might be up in their bedroom on their own and you might think they are on their PS4 or something like that. But, no, please go up and make sure they are OK and they are talking to you.
“Mental health is an illness and if this coming out just helps a couple of kids, Lewis would be chuffed. He would be happy about that.
“So please, just check on your kids and get them talking to you. That’s us, as two parents, coming out to other parents out there, please do it.”
Finally, Martine summed up both of their thoughts.
“We feel so lucky to have had Lewis in our life and I would do it all over again in a heartbeat,” she said.
For confidential support, the Samaritans can be contacted for free around the clock 365 days a year on 116 123.