Anyone else need a lie down after a chaotic school morning routine?
MY mornings with the kids always tend to start the same these days. Rose normally wakes up around 5am (give or take) for a feed and then settles back down (normally . . . and I say about four little prayers to ask her to sleep for another hour or so!) Then at around 6.30am I can hear Archie climbing down out of his bed (he has a big, high loft-style bed with a desk underneath, which was a brilliant idea at the time and looks amazing but in reality is a bit of a pain! I can’t see him in bed for one, meaning I have to climb up the ladder to check on him like some kind of scruffy, tired mama monkey; and also it’s an absolute nightmare to make up . . . changing the sheets is some kind of Crystal Maze-style challenge where if I bang my head more than five times I get locked in.)
He creeps into my room and climbs in with me for a cuddle; or that’s what I tell myself; in reality, he comes into bed with me so he can put Spongebob Squarepants on Netflix! So we lay there for about 35 minutes or so every morning, while I try to prise open my sleepdeprived eyes and he chuckles to himself about the cartoons! Then as the morning progresses, I make his lunchbox up, grab him a smoothie to drink, make sure he’s taken his vitamin (I forget a lot and no matter where I place it in the kitchen so that I’m reminded, I always seem to forget to . . . so if I remember, that’s a huge win!) Then I make breakfast, while he’s getting dressed (or supposed to be getting dressed). And it’s always something a bit extra with Archie! He’s not a cornflakes and juice kind of kid. (It’s my fault for doing baby-led weaning and making things like cinnamon roll-ups and eggy bread omelettes since he was one-year-old!) So chances are I’m making fluffy American pancakes at 7.50am while singing nursery rhymes to Rose and bouncing her in her chair with my foot whilst I whisk!) So pancakes done and Nutella slopped onto every pancake!
And before I know it, it’s 8.15am by the time I’ve changed Rose and chucked in my contact lenses.
I don’t know what it is, whether there’s some mystical occurrence or if that half hour between 7.50am and 8.20am disappears into the abyss and floats about in the Bermuda Triangle but something happens. We go from serene, calm tones, dulcet chats and happy moments of a morning,
A school morning is a manic morning that’s for sure, and it always seems to reach a crazy climax between the times of 8.20am and 8.30am
to, well, utter chaos.
As the minutes tick by, my voice gets increasingly loud and fractious.
“Archie, time to clean your teeth,” gets muttered, then said firmly, then yelled, then hollered at a decibel that makes my eyeballs hurt!
I ask him to finish his croissant approximately 55 times, to be answered with “I’m full” even though he’s only eaten half of it and he normally eats enough food to power up the Wales rugby team on international day! And then it’s 8.30am and I still haven’t put Rose in the carrier or the buggy to do the school run! And he still hasn’t brushed his teeth!
I frantically fill his drinks bottle and pop it in his bag, make sure he’s got his reading books, any consent forms (there’s always something, isn’t there?), along with another pound coin for doughnuts or sweets or whatever the PTA is selling to raise money for again! And he still hasn’t brushed his teeth!
So I ask again, while I get his shoes out of the cupboard and pop his coat on the banister ready. And then put Rose in the car seat to pop on the buggy. And he still hasn’t brushed his teeth!
So then you end up raising your voice, to be met with “Mum, why are you shouting?” Ummmm, I don’t know Archie babes, because perhaps I’ve asked you 12 times to brush your teeth since 8am and I’m now stood here at 8.35am and you still haven’t done it!
Teeth brushing finally commences and then it’s a hustle and jumble to chuck our coats on, shoes on, bags on and get out of the door as the school gate opens! Thank goodness we literally live around the corner from the school, otherwise I dread to think how many more times I’d have to ask him to brush his teeth!
I wonder who else starts their day with the best intentions? I make pancakes, we sometimes sit and chat, we have cuddles and laughs in bed while watching TV, but it’s always 8.20am . . . 8.20am is the time bomb moment where it turns into carnage and before I know it I’m asking why he’s taking his shoes back off when I asked him to put them on about five minutes ago!
And of course, there is always that moment when you realise there’s dried toothpaste on his cheek, or on his school hoodie, or he’s still got a bit of sleep in his eye that you missed when trying to wash his face whilst simultaneously trying to put his socks on his feet! I also find that just before we leave is the same moment that Archie decides to strike up a full-on heavy and deep conversation about life, or asks some really important questions that I feel I should take the time to sit down and answer with him, but because it’s now gone half-past eight, I just don’t have the time, so mentally park it to pick up after school, where I know he’ll probably not want to talk about it again!
A school morning is a manic morning that’s for sure, and it always seems to reach a crazy climax between the times of 8.20am and 8.30am. I always feel like I’m ‘booting’ us out of the house to get to the school gates, and I hope I’m not alone in feeling like I need a lie down after a classic school morning routine!