Baffling materials left me in the dark
WHAT on earth (or what in a parallel universe) was happening in fantasy drama His Dark Materials (BBC1, Sunday)? Yes, it is wonderfully lavish and has delightful CGI creatures, but finding the root of the story was the real quest for viewers.that said, I’m sure most living rooms across the country descended into a discussion about what “daemon” each viewer would like to be. In the drama, the animals are a representation of a person’s soul. Of course they are.
I note that no one in the drama found themselves with a slug, a beetle, a louse, or even an elephant as a soulmate. I’d like to see the latter fit in the sound studio for filming. One teenager was gifted a pigeon on his arm which must have been a complete downer and totally uncool. I wonder if you’re allowed to return your creature to the “keeper of souls” before the warranty runs out.
As for the story, take your pick.was it centred on young orphan Lyra who, we are told, is living out a “prophecy”, James Mcavoy’s adventurer and his journey through the “dust” to the “city in the sky”, or the kidnapping of a child by the “gobblers”? Will everything become clear? Maybe.and who cares about “scholastic sanctuary” at a university? It did take itself terribly seriously.
Even though author Philip Pullman’s best-selling series was launched before JK Rowling’s Harry Potter, they feel very similar.we had an orphan, a quest, a prophecy, elderly people with long beards, a musty olde-worlde dining hall and a “magisterium”, which sounded awfully like the “Ministry of Magic” in the world of Rowling. Ironically, there was a Potter film showing on the other side which ITV can quietly applaud itself for.
They both had fancy little contraptions, too. Potter had a “time turner”; Pullman has a “compass of truth” though, as yet, it’s utterly useless.
Then as if to intensify the fug, the BBC offered us an extra-long trailer of what we could expect in future episodes. Or was that just in the next instalment? It wasn’t clear. But we did glimpse the much-vaunted polar bear dressed in armour who will probably make mincemeat out of Mrs Coulter’s (Ruthwilson) monkey.
My favourite scene was a clutch of notable (human) performers, including actor James Cosmo (Highlander/ Braveheart), travelling at a pedestrian pace to London on barges.their serious acting faces were working brilliantly.we salute you and all who sail with you.when writer Jack Thorne, who penned more than 40 drafts, finally resolves the plot over the next seven hours, His Dark Materials might be an even bigger hit.whatever happens, I’m backing the polar bear.
In the crowded world of travelogues, there is a curious trend: torsos. Michael Portillo began this alarming practice in the recent first episode of Great Australian Railway Journeys (BBC2, Saturday), in which he pretended to be a Bondi Beach lifesaver before more daringly showing off his bedwear in a couchette on the Ghan railway: a body-hugging pink nightshirt. As he slipped into his bunk, the former minister of state at least had the decency to pull it down to preserve his dignity. Given his political past, I wonder if this breaches the Election Campaign purdah code.
The second episode was far less risque
Good Morning
Britain (ITV, Monday) has discovered the secret to broadcasting bad news. Set it to music. It doesn’t matter how horrible the news might be, just play a jaunty theme and everyone will feel better. The upside is that because you don’t hear most of the stories, you simply assume things are improving in the world. Ignorance is bliss on ITV. Amid this weirdness, newsreader Charlotte Hawkins reads on steadfastly, wondering what is happening.
So do we. as his primary-coloured wardrobe met the deep reds of the outback. Oddly enough, he’s never looked more at home.
Which brings us to Rick Stein’s Secret France (BBC2, Tuesday) in which the chef plunged himself, like a doomed lobster, into the choppy and apparently freezing waters of the Channel at Dieppe.as far as I’m aware, there was no mass evacuation of English nationals.well, not yet.
Stein, normally such a modest chap, was in nothing more than a pair of bathers. Thankfully, the cameraman kept his distance and Rick survived to bring us another delightful travel/cooking series. He does it well, sinking his teeth into an expansive fruit de mer before offering us mortal souls at home a workaday recipe of moules mariniere. You do spoil us.
There was a treat for those with a frail constitution: the andouillette sausage, the best in France, he said, which Stein consumed with intestinal fortitude. It’s offal on the inside... and outside. I’d like to see Greggs rustle up a vegan version.
Finally, Sunday Express columnist Alan Titchmarsh gave us Fifty Shades Of Green (ITV, Monday) and no, it wasn’t after an andouillette sausage. It was a tour of his favourite gardens. He left the best to last, of course: his own spectacular pile in Surrey.the garden was passable, too.we look forward to the open day,alan.we’ll bring a trowel.