‘I want to believe that old age would not have mellowed him’
THELMA MCGOUGH became John Lennon’s girlfriend at Liverpool College of Art in 1958. Today, after a successful career in TV production and as an award-winning artist, she is finishing her own memoir about growing up in Liverpool in the heart of the cultural and sexual revolution of post-war Britain.
I MET John the day I enrolled at college. He had been there a year already and, at 17, was a year older. My friend introduced me as Thelma Pickles, my name then, and he said in a mock Yorkshire accent: “How do! How are yer? Any relation to Wilfred?” [Wilfred Pickles was a household name at the time thanks to a long-running radio show, Have A Go.]
I took an instant dislike to him. But then, moments later, another girl arrived and said to him: “Hey John, I hear your mother’s dead?” [Julia Lennon had died after being hit by a car in July]. To which he just replied: “Yeah,” without batting an eyelid. I was captivated by his bravery and emotional strength. Then I became beguiled by his wit and outspokenness.
John was possessive and needy, and always wanting me to sag off though I loved college. He could be very tender in private bt but verbally b ll nasty t to t others th i in public. bli We broke up after an art college dance when we went upstairs to a darkened room for what he euphemistically called, a “five-mile-run” – because he’d read having sex expended the equivalent energy. We weren’t alone, so I said: “I’m not staying here”. John yanked me back by my hair and punched me. That ended it for me.
Ultimately, when goaded by him – because I wouldn’t resume the relationship after he’d hit me – I found my voice and became as verbally cruel as he was when I told him: “Don’t blame me
just because your mother is dead.” It was the only occasion I ever witnessed that he didn’t have a vitriolic retort.
I want to believe that age would not have mellowed him, that he would not have turned into a comfy old man in his New York apartment.
John suffered enormously from not having his father around, but then inflicted the same fate on his own son, Julian – I hope that he would have apologised for deserting him.
And I hope he would have found some level of independence, free of the need always to be half of a couple. From what I’ve read, he allowed himself to be controlled by Yoko.