Why fireworks night is just bang out of order

abroad not in this land of animal-lovers. But what stopped me with this post was the Scottish accent of the person doing the filming – a woman now revealed to be Fiona MacFarlane, of Hamilton, who spoke so tenderly to try to calm the poor dog.

Charlie’s panic had been going on for an hour following some “bomb-like” firework explosions nearby. And there was still another week to go until Bonfire Night itself.

“Shove yer fireworks up yer bahookie,” Fiona told the twits who throw squibs for a laugh.

The next day, my brother had to carry his petrified dog home from the park when some rockets (fireworks) were let off by some rockets (people).

Animal charities are campaigning for more restrictions on the sale and use of fireworks as complaints from concerned pet-owners have more than doubled in the past seven years.

They are calling for a cut to maximum noise levels – from 127 decibels to 97, which is about the level of a pneumatic drill.

And they want to see use strictly limited to four days in any given year – November 5, Hogmanay, Chinese New Year and Diwali.

Surely that’s more than enough to satisfy the needs of any self-respecting pyrotechnics fan: Occasional organised events conducted by experts.

If it upsets those who impulse-purchase £19.99 packs of 20 Air Strike rockets from Aldi while stocking up on fruit cider, who cares?

As Guido Fawkes himself might have said: “Enough of this torture.”