BACK ON THE BIKE WITH VALENTINO

“WHEN my life took the turn that it took, I said to myself, ‘Everywhere that I go for the rest of my life, someone is going to walk up to me and say, “F*** you!”’.”

Lance Armstrong’s opening remark in the first, 96-minute part of this new documentary sees him tell an anecdote in which he would have angered, amused and confused the intended recipients — and still come out on top.

The incident is redolent of his whole career since his initial triathlon triumph as a 13-year-old — and indeed his whole life.

The sheer chutzpah of the man is off the

IS it safe? The question every sportsperson is asking as Britain gradually uncurls from the brace position.

Forget hoping our shambolic government might lead by example. New slogan: ‘Stay alert; disguise yourself as a heavily pregnant woman; elbow way onto first lifeboat’. Is it safe? Remember Dustin

scale and there are no punches pulled in director Marina Zenovich’s elegantly fashioned documentary. She presents his astonishing story in a fresh light and interviews all the relevant cast involved in this fascinating drama.

The second part will be screened by BT Sport tomorrow evening (9.30pm) and promises to be even more absorbing.

For this film, Zenovich conducted eight interviews with Armstrong — with no subject off the table.

His win-at-all-costs mantra is recurrently evident, not least when

Hoffman in the film Marathon Man, being drilled for information by Nazi dentist Laurence Olivier? Poor Dustin didn’t know either.

Some sports have always been risky. On a 1-5 scale, from bowls to bare-knuckle bullfighting, football’s maybe a ‘two’.

Racing motorbikes, like Italian legend Valentino Rossi (left) looks like a solid ‘four’ to me.

Rossi has won everything and broken nearly everything doing it, ankles, legs, wrists. He’s seen his own shin bone waggling in fresh air.

But here he is in lockdown, at 41, thrashing round a dirt track like a lunatic and loving it.

Don’t think he is just oblivious to risk. He rode one lap at the Isle of Man TT, and said: “Awesome but too dangerous...” Even he draws the line at doing 180 in a 30-zone.

But Valentino lives far beyond safety, by instinct, desire, choice.

Is it safe? In the coming weeks,

he remembers his return to the saddle after defeating potentially fatal testicular cancer. He explains how he felt prior to the 1999 Tour de France, saying: “I held on to a lot of bitterness… you have 20 teams on a Tour — those other 19, f*** them, I was going to get them.” He achieved that by linking up with dodgy trainer Dr Michele Ferrari and by taking many of us will not get a free choice of answer to that, under the drill. We’ll have to face it.

Key workers have had to find a way to face it all along. Some called on higher instincts, above animal fear and self-preservation.

Valentino finds a higher ideal too, in his way. No life without risk, no joy without jeopardy.

I’ll be trying to channel a bit of his spirit now. And in a few weeks I might even take the helmet off.

vast amounts of erythropoietin – or EPO – a hormone that triggers production of red blood cells and so increases the body’s ability to transport oxygen.

“We’d already been dabbling in low-octane you know whatever it was — cortisone or whatever was around — but EPO was a whole other level. The sport went from this low-octane doping, which had always been around, to this high-octane rocket fuel,” laughs Armstrong.

He often tries to charm, his athleticism is undoubted — but conspicuously absent is contrition for the arrant cheating that brought him seven Tour de France titles.

Also worth a view is 2015’s The Program (Amazon Prime), in which Ben Foster’s portrayal of Armstrong and resemblance to him is uncanny.

But this documentary is the real must-see for any sports fan.