Feeling like a loser in the generation game
This week I had that moment that comes to us all at some point in our lives when I basically turned into my mother.
I spent the whole evening moaning to other people from Generation X (born in the 60s and 70s) about how the millennials (born in the 80s and 90s) don’t know how good they’ve got it.
How I enjoyed giving them a good (verbal) bashing about their lack of social and conversational skills, their rubbish work ethic and their tedious obsession with everything tech.
It was only as I headed home, alone with my thoughts, replaying the events of that evening, that I suddenly felt very, very old.
I’d vowed to myself that I would not get as negative as my mother. But here I was, sounding like her, out of touch, a dinosaur!
If that sounds disrespectful to my mum, you need to know that she’ll love it – she relishes being thought old fashioned and cynical.
But I don’t, so I’m trying to understand what makes millennials so different to me. And I’ve discovered the biggest difference is that there’s been a major shift in core values.
Like most people of my age, I was brought up to focus on justice, integrity, family, duty and sacrifice.
Now, I’m not saying millennials don’t hold these values, but they don’t shape their lives. I came across a blog by Sean Michael Floyd, who writes the key values for him and his friends are happiness, discovery, passion, diversity and sharing.
He describes happiness as “something that demands a high (if not the highest) priority in life. Especially in the workplace”.
I was brought up to stick with your job – happy or not. Work was not a place to have fun. A job was supposed to be for life. How dull.
On discovery, he writes that travelling the world, trying out new restaurants and going to festivals is just what you do – it’s not a treat.
This is in sharp contrast to my life, where a trip to our local Wimpy once a year was as good as it got.
My mum would say: “Why waste money eating out, when I can cook better for half the price?” I must admit, I often say that to my kids.
Passion, for millennials, Sean says is “ever present”. Just look at “the plethora of lifestyle blogs, start-up companies, podcasts, and pinterests that were born out of that burning desire to create.” Yep, that’s redefined passion. For me it’s always preceded by the words “night of ”.
On diversity, he writes, millennials don’t blink an eye at “black, white, brown, gay, straight, bi, male, female, transgendered, transplanted, and transparent.”
Is it any wonder some of our older “millenniallight” institutions find diversity so tricky?
Finally, there’s sharing. Putting every aspect of your life out there on social media, Sean says, has become the norm for him and his friends.
“It’s become an essential part of life,” he says. “Something I value highly because it provides so much benefit for all.”
I still don’t get why posting selfies or snaps of your dinner is so vital but I can see that compared to other youthful behaviour – like binge drinking or taking drugs – it’s pretty harmless.
And you can’t argue with making happiness a priority. Even crusty old Generation Xers like me can see that.
■■Operation Smile is a charity that gives free treatment to children born with a cleft lip or palate, so they can eat, speak and smile without being stigmatised.
Its organisers have cleverly teamed up with Invisalign, which makes clear aligners to fix crooked teeth. Just take a selfie and send it to #4millionsmiles and the company will donate 1 US dollar to Operation Smile. So come on, say cheese, flash those gnashers – and get Invisalign to flash the cash.