BY A CRUEL TWIST OF FATE
later it had reached her liver and by February 2019 it was terminal.
Sam says: “It was devastating. Amy had been given a death sentence, while I had been given a chance with my new heart. She was so upset thinking she wouldn’t see Esmee grow up, graduate and get married. That was all she wanted.
“She wanted the same last name as Esmee, so we planned our wedding for the end of April. Amy sat down and explained Mummy was poorly and while Esmee knew something was wrong, we didn’t push the fact – we wanted their time together to be unspoiled.”
Amy, 42, bought her wedding dress and ordered 60 slabs of fudge because she didn’t want a traditional cake. Sadly, as the days counted down, Amy was denied her dream. In considerable pain, she asked to be taken to St Peter’s hospice.
Sam cancelled their planned wedding and booked a registrar to marry them in the hospice on April 3. But by March 31, Mother’s Day, Amy was fading.
PEACEFUL
Sam says: “Esmee gave her a Mother’s Day card, but Amy didn’t register what was happening. She was in and out of consciousness. The last thing she said was, ‘Please don’t leave me on my own’.
“I slept that night in the armchair in her room. The following morning, she would not respond. I sat holding her hand. Over the course of an hour-and-ahalf, her breathing just slowed down and stopped. It was very peaceful at the end.”
Sam, who has a son Tobias, 11, from a previous relationship, then told Esmee Mummy had gone. He says: “I had to break Esmee’s heart by telling her that her mum was dead. At the funeral, people wrote their memories of Amy on wooden hearts, which I’m keeping for Esmee to read when she’s older.”
Sam visited Amy one last time at the funeral home to see her in her white lacenecked bridal gown. He recalls: “It was very difficult, but she looked beautiful.”
Little Esmee is now Sam’s reason for living. “She has been a complete rock,” he says. “She misses her mum so much, but we talk about her all the time and have a shelf with pictures of Amy on it.
“Luckily, I have a lot of support from Amy’s mum, who lives close by as, with my ataxia, I worry about having a setback in case I’m not here for Esmee.”
Sam only knows that his heart donor was a man in his early 20s. He adds: “I wrote to his family as there’s barely an hour in the day when I don’t think about what they’ve done for me. If they knew I’m still here to look after Esmee because of them, I hope they would be really proud of themselves and of their son.”