1 to 10 in One easy lesson
BEZT HAVE A REZT NOW, EH, JEFF?
The marvellous way the capitalist system works, is it rewards hard work. This is why the head of Amazon, Jeff Bezos, has just earned $13billion in one day.
He must have grafted himself to exhaustion, because it takes the entire British economy three days to earn that much.
So the whole country, all the bus drivers and teachers and people in nail bars and car showrooms, all the florists, jugglers, pizza leaflet delivery people, porn actors, Holly Willoughby, drug dealers, the bloke who cleans the windows on the Shard, the lads who spin the Waltzer at fairgrounds, the annoying idiot who shouts “we buy any car” on
that advert, tarot card readers, people who knock on your door offering strange services such as “do you need your chimney converted into a paddling pool, mate?”, Olly Murs, lion tamers and all the people who work in Amazon packing and delivering, including those who were told if they didn’t come to work during the lockdown they’d be sacked, Jeff did the same amount of work as all of them and absolutely everyone in Britain did for three days.
None of us would begrudge him a day off.
It was the 10th anniversary of One Direction forming the other day and I missed the articles about the event.
So I’ll guess they went “200 fans screamed so much they literally caught fire with excitement when Harry said they were the greatest people that ever lived, and Liam cried as he dedicated a new tattoo to a sick budgie he visited in Melbourne, but fans were DISGUSTED that Zayn (above) didn’t put out a message saying he’d been dribbling with happiness all day so Tania23981 wrote on Twitter, ‘he’s dead to me, I’ve replaced my poster of him with a signed statement about values from Keir
Starmer’.”