This Spanish ex-pat saga is not oh que

FANCY swapping the damp and grey of the UK for a new cheapas-chips life in the Costas?

The Spanish coastal towns are bursting with British ex-pats who’ve done just that and are blinging up their statics while tucking into tapas on the cheap.

Take Karen, who swapped grey skies for a sun-filled life in Benidorm, the party capital of the Costas (Bargain Loving Brits In The Sun, Channel 5). She runs a tattoo and piercing parlour which is a hit with the stag and hen-do crowd.

But she’s even more popular as a translator for Brits who can’t speaka da lingo. Be it sorting out problems like towed-away cars or ordering another prescription, fluent Spanish speaker Karen gets roped in to help.

“We will have the Brits in Benidorm speaking Spanish,” declared Karen – and so launched her own Spanish tutorials at the local cafe.

Benidorm’s premier drag queen Wayne and his partner hairdresser Gary were keen to learn a few expressions.

“Today’s lesson is about visiting the doctor,” said Karen at her first session. She explained that the word for cough was “Tos”. Tapping her chest, she said: “Now repeat it after me... Tos.”

It was an education. “I’ve just learnt I’m married to a tosser,” declared Wayne, shooting a look at Gary.

A funny moment, but a rare one from a series which has lost its sparkle. I switched off before the end. It’s a shame as the previous series was fab. ADDICTED to painkillers, a stint in rehab and the breakdown of his marriage, Ant has had more than his fair share of hard knocks this past year. So it was fantastic to see him back on top and holding it together at the NTA awards where, together with Dec, the nation’s favourite duo came up trumps again as they scooped three awards. “It’s been a tough year,” Ant said, reflecting on his battles and as he hugged and thanked Dec for helping him through. It shone a huge spotlight