World class fantasy

England lifting trophy as likely as good Brexit LEMBIT IN ORBIT AS SPACE MP

AFTER the parliamentary shenanigans this week plunged Theresa May’s future into fresh doubt, I bumped into a Tory backbencher in the House of Commons bar.

I wanted to know what he rated his boss’s chances were of surviving the summer.

“Tricky couple of weeks coming up,” I said to him. “You must be getting a bit worried.”

He thought for a second, then said: “Nah. I think we’ll get out of the group easy enough. Quarters might be a bit tricky though. Brazil most likely.

“But it’s worth a few quid on us. I got 16-1.”

Muddle

World Cup fever has reached Westminster, you see.

And with it, the relentless sense of optimism that England might – just might – do something spectacular.

I found myself briefly tempted to stick a couple of quid on.

But it’s madness. Not just because politicians are terrible tipsters but because I’ve fallen into this trap before.

What fuels this hopeful mood as we head into tournaments? Is it optimism or arrogance?

We seem to drift into these World Cups, and Euros, and even the Eurovision Song Contest with an iron belief that we should be winning them.

People tear up the form book, ignore the statistics and press on in the belief we’ll come out on top... Which brings us to Brexit. However you voted, no one can be under the impression that things are EVEN if a career in British politics does not work out for a politician it seems there is still hope – beyond the final frontier.

This week’s strangest press release revealed Asgardia, the virtual nation in space, has formed its first parliament. going well. The myth that we can come away from the negotiations with some sort of good deal is up there with thinking we’ll get our hands on the World Cup.

But listen to some of the hard core and they are already convinced it’s all going to go well. It isn’t. It’s going to be very, very unpleasant.

Already, banks are planning to move staff out of the country. Manufacturing, tech outfits and even fancy-dress firms are heading for the exit too. We are

SNP Commons leader Ian Blackford, right, led his party in an exodus from Prime Minister’s Questions after he was refused a vote on a point of parliamentary procedure.

It was a show of resistance reminiscent of Braveheart – but with more authentic accents. After Mr Blackford’s decision, the 26 left the chamber swiftly. In fact, as my colleague Will said, it was the quickest Scottish exit since the 1998 World Cup. Members say: “Asgardia is the answer to how humanity can colonise space peacefully and inspirationally.”

Founded by Dr Igor Ashurbeyli, the state looks to move on from the conflicts of Earth as a new multi-national nation with 12 different going to see a squeeze on jobs, on the economy as a whole, and – in particular – problems for the NHS and social care as free movement ends.

Doing business with the EU is going to get harder. But still, many people cling to the belief that we can muddle through because we’re Britain.

Maybe it’s time to show a little humility and reevaluate our place in the world. Maybe think again and have another crack at a vote.

Theresa May, at last week’s meeting languages being spoken by their citizens.

Asgardia has a constitution, flag and coat of arms.

It also works off its own calendar and is developing its own currency. And, as if it couldn’t get any weirder, Lembit Opik is one of its MPS. of world leaders, didn’t even get the chance to sit down with Donald Trump.

And that was at the G7, where she was up against only a handful of other countries.

We were at the back of the queue. And that’s how it’s going to be from here.

You won’t hear it at this World Cup but there’s one football chant we should pay attention to.

A Leeds United one, as it happens: “We’re not famous any more...” I WAS away last week and my beach reading included Dynasty, by Tom Holland. A superb read, it’s a history of the House of Caesar that Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson called a “wonderful, surging narrative”. It recalls the lavish lifetyles, lust for power and sexual excesses of Nero, Caligula et al. Wonder why Boris enjoyed it so much?